Quote:
Originally Posted by Innocent Hafeez
Men and machines
Though science has enriched humans with immense knowledge, they are oblivious of using it for their benefits. They made Machines to serve them. But, instead of getting any advantage, they, like servants, engaged themselves in caring of their instruments, and completing their needs to avoid any damage. Their reliance on these self-made tools was to such an extent that it has enabled them to rule mankind in future. (Words 71)
|
My suggestions:
1- I think following sentence is wrong and not in context of original paragraph.
"
But, instead of getting any advantage,".
In original paragraph at no place it is written that humans are not getting any advantage of machines. Paragraph is about not proper use of machines.
Instead you can write "
But, instead of getting desired advantages,".
2- Word like "
instruments" or any replacement of it, is not used in original paragraph. So don't use "
instruments".
Instead you can write,"managing them properly"
3- Don't use word "
tools". Always focus and write keyword that is "
machines". Keyword should not be replaced by any other word