In my humble opinion, the basic crux of the given passage is missing in the precis. The precis needs to align with the given arguments of the passage author, which means to avoid adding your own opinion and interpretations.
The first sentence seems a bit off, as the author has introduced the main theme of the whole passage, whereas the first line of precis doesn't reflect that. Also, there is a difference between "The Greeks" and "The Early Greeks" as it is clearly shown from the passage. The author first started with Early greeks and then ended his passage on The Greeks, showing a clear revolution in their perception in contrast with Early greeks. So writing "The Greeks" is like writing everything in your precis, except the precis.
In the 2nd sentence, you mentioned "individual" which is your own personal interpretation of the author's words, not something that is present in the passage. Also, just simply stating "the enemies" doesn't convey the argument completely.
In the 3rd sentence, again your own personal interpretation/opinion can be seen. In the whole argument, there is nowhere mentioned "artist" in the original passage that was shown to dislike nature.
In the 4th sentence, "The wild landscape had no place in the art of the Greek whereas the fruitful fields were only represented in the background." is a just simply a supporting sentence to the main argument that you've missed. Your sentence needs to reflect "The struggle of Nature to find a place in Greek Art" instead of copying the same words form the passage to the precis. Also, it is suggested to never write examples in precis as it harms the precision, until or unless it is strikingly unavoidable to include them, which is not a case here.
The 5th sentence is honestly a disaster, as "their greatest days " is your interpretation, "their struggle " is not mentioned in the original passage, and you've missed the whole author's reasoning in your sentence.
The 6th sentence is again a disaster, reflecting "jan churana".
The title doesn't feel right after reading the precis.
Moreover, anyone is free to criticize me as it will serve in the betterment of my own assessment.