Quote:
Originally Posted by aishalam
Hello! Below I've shared my thoughts and comments on your piece of writing. I hope you find it useful. [KEY: RED= remove, GREEN= Additions, BRACKETS= Comments]
Covid-19 continues to wreak (spelling error. Should be wreck) havoc across the world taking heavy toll on human lives, disrupting everyday-life, and causing heavy (change the adjective since you already used heavy once before in the same sentence. Also lives and life occur very close to one another as well. It's not wrong but it makes the sentence difficult to read. Sentences should flow and not be jarring) damage to the economy. The deadly virus is one of the rarest (It is actually not all that rare. Pandemics have happened before and at worse scales. Remember the Black Plague? Killing about 40-60% of the population of Europe before all was said and done. It swept through the rest of the world too. Then the Spanish Flu occured which bears a lot of similarities to the current situation and was aggravated by the fact that they had just wrapped up a world war! If you want to make such a claim- back it up. How do you know it's so important? Support it with at least one argument. Sure it's too soon to actually predict much of anything but take examples from history and similar circumstances and how human beings changed. Take a look at Literature to see how writers view pandemics and how it affects us. Suggested examples: The Masque of the Red Death by Edgar Allan Poe is a really short short story and an interesting commentary on the inevitability of death. The Decameron by Giovanni Boccaccio is another great read and also helps us take a look at social distancing measures of the 14th century and how it affected the people especially the youth. The Plague by Albert Camus would definitely point you towards the right direction about the philosophical, cultural and social impact of such events and The Stand by Stephan king would definitely give you a wider perspective and make you realise just how much worse this could have been. ) occurrences in the human history that will have changed everything for ever. By the time it will be contained, it would have affected human thinking processes, state’s modus operandi, crime rate, etc. There is a need for the governments around the world to be well prepared even for the post-Covid19 period in advance as part of damage control exercise. (The word "exercise" sounds off here. Damage control itself is fine. "Part of" should be removed as well.)
(NOTE: I will review the rest of the paragraphs one by one if you would like. You've written quite an interesting article, it just needs a little fine tuning. Overall it actually covers a lot of aspects and does it's job well.)
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1. I am extremely grateful for your sincerity which can be witnessed the way you have checked just one single paragraph helping me to understand everything in detail including appropriate usages, examples, etc. Honestly speaking, I am finding it difficult to choose appropriate words to express my gratitude to you for such meticulous read with the sole purpose of helping me so that I could improve.
2. To clarify for my understanding, can't we use "one of the rarest for such occurrence keeping in view the fact it had been declared pandemic with magnitude to cause damage to economies, human lives, etc. at the global level. It is almost unthinkable in present era that world would came to a standstill. In other words, it seems like clock has stopped for a while. In that backdrop, while equating the pandemic with the Black Plague and Spanish Flu. Isn't that okay to use "one of the rarest".
3. I would be extremely grateful if you would kindly check the remaining part as well. Also, please do correct me wherever needed even if there is article mistake.
Regards,