Thread: Education in Pakistan
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Old Friday, February 24, 2006
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Salaam,

Brother Chandio, the essay was nice and assiduously packed with facts. However, I would like to drive your attention to a serious problem in your writing.

I have noticed from my experience that nobody can ever mark out his English mistakes by himself until he doesn't discover it in his learning or is told by someone else.

Now while I was reading your essay, I found several redundant, contradictory and meaningless assertions. A few of them are pasted below:

fight and conquer the battle of life (a battle is won, not conquered)

regarding communicating themselves with one another (no need of word 'themselves')

champion the cause of un-educated (Champion means to support. What do you mean by support the cause of un-educated? It gives me a negative impression)

fought for the freedom for a separate homeland (You should erase either 'freedom' or 'separate homeland', because ultimately both mean the same. This is called redundancy which is strictly prohibited in English).

These are just a few sentences that I could pick up in a cursory glance while I am writing this. I noticed several others when I read it.

I am facing a little time constaint, else, I would have pointed out every sentence and would help you correcting it. I hope you don't mind. I have nice intentions behind such rectification.

Regards with Love,
Adil Memon
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