Case against polygamy
By Qazi Faez Isa
The caricature of a Muslim man in non-Muslim societies is of a husband having four wives. The Muslim response is invariably apologetic. But can a Muslim man marry more than once? This very question was asked on television of a lady armed with a doctorate from the West who runs a network of Islamic schools.
She tersely replied that a man can marry more than once and does not require permission. An emphatic response, which brooked no doubt and slammed shut the discussion. The conviction with which an educated lady from one's faith endorsed a prejudice, saddened and hurt.
The majestic words of the Most High are often forgotten or else subjected to uninformed, whimsical and arbitrary pronouncements. The Almighty directs us "to study" the Quran (2:121). In addressing the question of polygamy, guidance can be had from a number of Quranic verses.
The Quranic verse pressed into service to justify a man marrying up to four wives is verse 3 of the fourth Surah (chapter) entitled Nisaa (women). This verse is often selectively read and mistranslated. To best appreciate the issue, the entire verse and its preceding two are reproduced:
"O mankind! Reverence your Guardian-Lord, Who created you from a single person, created of like nature, his mate, and from them twain scattered (like seeds) countless men and women; reverence Allah, through whom ye demand your mutual (rights), and (reverence) the wombs (that bore you): for Allah ever watches over you."(4:1)
"To orphans (yatama) restore their property (when they reach their age), nor substitute (your) worthless things for (their) good ones; and devour not their substance (by mixing it up) with your own. For this is indeed a great sin."(4:2)
"If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans (yatama), marry from amongst them women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one.... That will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice". (4:3)
In certain translations the aforementioned verse 3 is translated by leaving out the words "from amongst them" rendering it, "If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans (yatama), marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four."
Such a truncated translation leaves the text meaningless and it cannot be stated, as the exponents of four marriages contend, that the part of the text "marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four" stands alone, and has no nexus with the earlier part of the same verse.
This translation also offends the latter part of the verse, which uses the words "fear" and "justly" words which are also found in the opening of the verse, and therefore, clearly demonstrate that the verse must be read as a whole.
Those canvassing polygamy attempt to refute this by stating, "then the word 'women' appearing in the text adds nothing?" However, if the term "women" (menan nisaa) did not follow orphans (yatama) then "yatama" appearing alone would cover boys and young girls, since the term yatama includes both.
The earlier verse (4:2) which warns about safeguarding the property of yatama extends to protect the property of both girls and boys, as the word "yatama" is not qualified. Moreover, the term that follows yatama is not simply "women" but "those women" (menan nisaa), which means the women amongst the yatama, and therefore, the reference to two, three, or four" can only be to yatama women and not women generally.
The term yatama is usually translated as "orphans"; however, the Arabic word is rich in meaning. In English, an orphan is one whose parents are dead, but in Arabic a child whose mother is dead but whose father is alive is not a yatim (singular, the plural of which is yatama).
Women whose husbands are dead are also covered by the term yatama as the Quran itself makes clear by use of the term yatamal nisaa (4:127). Girls whose fathers are dead would continue to remain "yatama" until they get married.
This verse prescribes the protection of not only women whose fathers are dead but also other categories of females who are in a precarious or vulnerable position such as maids and widows, who may be more open to exploitation. Or the hunger in their bellies or those of their children may force them to walk a scarlet street.
Only in marrying a yatama (adult lady) can a man marry more than once. However, there is an almost impossible condition to fulfil before marrying more than one yatama lady; the mandate to deal with all such wives justly and equally.
Because "if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one". The equal-treatment requirement is a continuous one for the entire duration of the marriage. Our Benevolent Creator does not want any man to slip up and cautions man again that a single wife will "be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice".
Can a man treat two wives fairly and justly? Almighty Allah, tells man, later in the same Surah (4:129), that, "ye are never able to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire".
Would then a God-fearing man embark on a perilous journey where he must continuously and forever attempt the impossible - to act fairly and justly between two or more wives? To be able to act fairly with two wives would require two hearts in one body and "Allah has not made for any man two hearts in his (one) body" (33:4).
Other than the aforesaid verse (4:3) there is no verse in the Holy Quran which permits a man having more than one wife. There are, however, a number of verses which suggest monogamy.
"Marry those amongst you are single" (24:32) is a command applicable to both men and women. If a woman is marrying a man who already has a wife she would not be marrying a man who is "single".
Verse 40 of Surah Nisaa is again suggestive of monogamy - "If ye decide to take one wife in place of another", since there is only one "place" to occupy or take, next to the husband. If it were permissible for a man to marry more than one woman then it would not be a question of substitution but of addition.
It is surely not without significance that the first verse of Surah Nisaa starts by telling us about how the human race began; with the creation of a "single person" (Hazrat Adam) and from him "his mate" (Bibi Hawwa). A monogamous relationship and a perfect pair.
The pairing of the first man and woman populated the world. "O mankind! "We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female" (49:13). The theme of pairs runs throughout the Holy Quran. "We ... produce on the earth every nobler creatures, in pairs" (31:10). "He made you in pairs" (35:11). "He has made for you pairs from among yourselves" (42:11). "And (have We not) created you in pairs" (78:8).
With trepidation, one inquires the purpose of Almighty Allah repeatedly telling us that He has created us in pairs. The answer, too, is found in the Book of Wisdom: "Thus does Allah set forth for men their lessons by similitudes" (47:3). And "do not treat Allah's Signs (ayah or verses) as a jest"(2:231).
The Lord of the Worlds explains through the Quran that He has made His creation in perfect proportion, measure and balance. "Verily, all things have We created in proportion and measure" (27:49).
"He has created the heavens and the earth in just proportion and has given you shape, and made your shapes beautiful" (44:3). In a world of such perfect order and balance, where men and women are found in roughly equal numbers, harmony could not be maintained if each, most or even some men were to marry more than one woman. And monasticism is neither prescribed nor recommended (see 57:27).
The relationship between spouses is one of companionship, love, beauty, joy and comfort, which harbours not a third, or a fourth, or a fifth. "It is He Who created you from a single person, and made his mate of like nature, in order that he might dwell with her (in love).
When they are united, she bears a light burden and carries it about. When she grows heavy, they both pray to Allah their Lord: 'If Thou givest us a goodly child, we vow we shall (ever) be grateful' " (9:189).
The source of affection between a husband and wife is a gift from our Supreme Lord, the Source of Peace, who bestows "hearing and sight and intelligence and affections" (16:78).
"He hath put affection between their hearts: not if thou hadst spent all that is in the earth, couldst thou have produced that affection, but Allah hath done it" (8:63). An affection that only a pair can share, like the intimacy, texture, feel and smell of a garment next to one's body - "They are your garments and ye are their garments" (2:187).
The due proportion and balance of creation may at times be imperfect, with the dead left in the battlefields and the widows at home, or in the form of the impecunious young orphan lady whose hunger contemplates prostitution.
In a world of perfect balance there must be a mechanism to repair the fabric of society. And in the Perfect Book (in verse 3 of Surah Nisaa) there is for the purpose just such a needle and thread.
The needle is there to mend not to harm, to stitch a tear not to pierce open another. But those who take more than one wife, do they take them from amongst the yatama, from among widows, and unmarried orphans who no one wants to marry? Or does one witness in the second, third or fourth wife youthful freshness and comely forms? An abandonment of "the command of self-restraint" (48:26) and a rejection of Allah's message - "they reject (the warning) and follow their (own) lusts" (54:3).
The only time that the Lord of Righteousness places the burden of another on a soul is when such a one misleads those without knowledge. "Let them bear, on the Day of Judgment, their own burdens in full, and also (something) of the burdens of those without knowledge, whom they misled. Alas, how grievous the burdens that they will bear" (16:25).
The Quran prescribes monogamy and the only exception is in respect of unmarried ladies whose fathers are dead, or are widows. This exception cannot replace the rule, nor be used to indulge in lust. It is there, as it states, to justly restore a balance.