I entered the room...

Salamualikum...
Chairman and the two members: Walikum Salam
Chairman: Be seated please....
Chairman: Congratulations for the new suit...
Me: Thankyou Sir..
C: you wearing it for the first time?
Me: No sir, its my second time(lying..It was a brand new one)...
C: You wore it for the psychological also?
Me: No sir, i made it for a friend's wedding...
C: You married?
Me: No sir
C: Why not....? You are 25...
Me: (My God... What the hell is this...? Why i am not married... I dont know..What do i say to him... Time is passing and i am confused and nevous and speechless and i dont remember what was my reply)
C: What do you do for your X........needs?
Me: (Blushed and quiet and said a few word, which i think had something related to family planning)
C: what is your opinion about family planning?
Me: mmmmmm..Sir i think its all right... I quoted a hadith(half heartidly)
C: Lets discuss some serious business... What do you think is extremism?
Me: ( lost in thoughts over my stupidity and the general's outspoken frankness) Sir i think citizens of pakistan dont do it... Its a product of external hand..... There are 40 camps of RAW in Baluchistan...
C: (cutting me) Haanhhh... Do you know what is RAW? Who does it belong to?
Me: (sweating and rubbing my hands beneath the table) Sir it is India's and it is a stealth organistion... It works behind the scene and is not visible but it is operative in Baluchistan...
C: What is the future of MMA?
Me: Sir it is on a fall...
C: R they extremist?
Me: Sir Jumati Islami is not... But the parties wid their roots in medrass are?

Chairman: What is the future of MMA in NWFP...?
Me: Sir, they are gonna come again...

C: Y?
Me: They have done a lot for their constituencies…

Chairman now requested the other members to have their share( but chairman did not have his lust satisfied as yet)…

Member1. Do you think that 9/11 and other related events give a reason to the religious zealots to strengthen their political agenda?
Me: Yes sir, to give you an example.. Hitler did the same…He started defaming the people least responsible for Germany’s fate… He poisoned the minds of the people of his country to support him against his ambitions……..

Member1. What is MQM?
Me: (I have never felt so stupid in my life before answering this question and while answering it I tried my best to make myself an ass) Sir, MQM wants separation from the domain of Pakistan………
My answer for a moment shocked the member and I saw it on his face….To cover up my stupidity I did not stop here and uttered something else which I don’t remember now and neither will I like to recall it…

Member1. Gentleman, do you believe in Two nation theory(TNT)?
Me: For a moment I felt like saying no( the reason being the fact that I was cursing myself for the idiocy that I had just showered but then I decided to answer by saying that “ to some extent, I believe in the TNT “.. but then I thought that the guy asking the question is an army personnel… If I tell him that in TNT I dont believe he will kick me outside and place a ban on my appearance for taking any govt exam… I recovered myself within one thousandth of a second..
Me: Yes sir I do(as if I am being asked to accept Beyonce’ as wife)…. And I think that the spirit of TNT can be revived anytime…
Then I don’t know what happened and the discussion went to Abdul Ghafar Khan and then Tribal culture in Pathan belt and then I was switched over to the third member…

Member2. You have grey hair and you are only 25.. why don’t you dye them…
Me: Sir, the ablution is defective with dyed hair and secondly I like them this way.

Member2.You mentioned that your father is an officer in the Jail services of Pakistan… What in you opinion are the flaws in our prison system?
Me: bla bla bla bla bla

Member2. I have heard that female prisoners are sold out, they are raped, exploited etc.
Me: No sir, this is not correct… bla bla bla

Now the last session of the interview was started

Chairman: You have mentioned that the only thing that you are proud of in your whole life is your father?
Me. Yes sir, you are very right.
Then he discussed(infact it was something like a summo wrestling of words without any thought whatsoever).. And I must say that he kept on contradicting me and I kept on (smilingly and without offending him) answering him to the best of all that I had kept with me all these years… But he gained on me and I went speechless in the end…

Chairman: Thank you gentlemen… You can leave now…
Me: You are welcome sir…

I got up from my chair and the moment I turned my back the chairman took my name to get my attention… I turned…
Chairman. It is not wrong to be proud of ones father.
Me: I know sir (smile)…

And that was it… Mine was the lengthiest of the interviews in the whole NWFP batch… All the rest of the candidates did not face counter arguments and taunts but I did… Everything that I said was contradicted.. I could see that they wanted me to talk… They were watching me and observing me with zeal… The moment I will stop they wont proceed… They will let me think… And this way this entire affair went…


“Some part of the interview that I missed in the first episode”

Chairman: What type of a marriage do you like.. Arranged or Love?
Me: Arranged sir.
C: Y?
Me: Because that is a part of our culture. We leave our marriage to our parents and they decide it.
C: What If your parents get you an ugly wife?
Mesmiling) Sir, beauty is not a universal concept… It is not absolute.. it is relative. A girl might be pretty to you but she might be ugly for me and vice versa.. And besides why in the world would my parents bring me an ugly wife?