Though i am not a senior member, but i would point out some of your mistakes for your correction and benefit.
I have to read your essay, again and again, to actually determine the caliber of your writing skills. Your write up is a blend of good vocabulary with poor sentence structure. Either you have been editing your essay in MS word, replacing words with the synonyms, or your have good vocabulary with poor sentence structure and choice of words. Your sentences are complete and without any grammatical mistakes, yet it does not meet the level set by Express Tribune scrutiny team or CSS essay paper examiner.
There are two points i want to make regarding your essay.
1. You use "that" quite often; even where the usage is unnecessary.
hey guys, I am a beginner and i dont know that much about essay writing
please seniors have a look on my article and point out some mistakes so that I can improve my writing skill.
The only remedy seems, is to provide education so that they can get jobs and feed their family.
colleges and universities in every small village and city so that everyone can get standard education.
Not only building schools but the teacher selection should also be done with transparency so that merit based teachers should ....
unnecessary thats
Avoid using "so that". use only "so" and continue with the sentence. "that" used again and again reflects immaturity of the article/essay writer.
2. To be honest, your choice of words is poor; i am not talking about vocabulary but choice of words. You might have adequate vocabulary but your usage of words reflects your average writing skills. You unnecessarily prolongs a sentence. To rectify this area, think hard for more suitable words when writing and be precised. Here are some examples from your above essay.
neither I know what should be the length and word density of any essay.
"neither I know the required length and word density of essay."
As far as I have noticed, women working in other homes (maids) and women belonging to other families of same class endure such acts.
"As far as I have noticed, working women of lower classes endure such acts."
They don’t even know the status of a sister, daughter...
"They are unaware of the status of a sister, daughter..."
It is the education which tells us the status of a mother, sister and a daughter and tells us the difference between a spouse and them.
"Education educates us with the status of a mother, sister, daughter and ..."
I have just replaced your words with more appropriate ones. The words used by me are frequently used in general writing. These errors of yours have nothing to do with vocabulary. In fact, i don't doubt your vocabulary but your choice of words.
I consider it a blessing if someone points out your mistakes before time; i have not been blessed yet with my articles posted in this forum.
I have opened a thread for the purpose of articles/essay evaluation. You can ponder over the errors depicted, and can write further material to be checked by the senior members by posting in the following thread.
Grammar Police
http://www.cssforum.com.pk/css-compu...ar-police.html