It started (for me) in the June of 2014. I am never going to forget those days when I voluntarily accepted 8 pm to 8 am night duties in the Oncology ward (so-called 'death ward' in my hospital), just for the preparation of CSS. I spent the nights engrossed in books, with occasional interruptions by patients, barely getting a couple of hours' sleep. The staff and the patients used to sing my praises, considering my late-night vigils a sign of my dutifulness. I too was a happy man. And why wouldn't I be happy? Books had been the sole love of my life. On top of that, I was getting a lot of prayers from the patients for being there for them when nobody else was!
Days passed, along came the February of 2015, and with it the written exams. I attempted them to the best of my abilities. My confidence was at an all-time high. Right after the exams, I returned to the usual hectic routine of the house-job, learning new skills and methods everyday. The thoughts of success and failure arose in my mind side by side every now and then, but I had little time to indulge them!
Life was smooth, I had begun preparing for part-1 FCPS while waiting for the result of written CE-2015. And then came October. It brought not only the 2015 written result, but an earthquake with it as well. I am still figuring whether it was the jolts on the inside or the outside that shook me more! I was shattered! I had my part-1 exam in just 2 weeks, and my confidence was all but lost! I picked up my broken pieces and decided to rebuild myself. Allah blessed me with success in part-1 FCPS. I got my post-graduate training slot within a month of clearing the exam. On top of that, I got inducted as a permanent Medical Officer (BS-17) through PPSC during the same period. And then I got a lovely wife to go with all this as well..!!!!
As I logged in today, I found the news of final 2015 result. I looked for a few names, as I had been planning to congratulate them since October. But I couldn't find them. I only have this to say to them: you are going to make it, sooner or later. Trust the divine wisdom, your success has been delayed for reasons which neither you nor those around you understand--but those are good reasons beyond any doubt, and you shall come to understand them later in life.
For those who have qualified and got allocations, know that I am as happy to see you succeed as if it was my own success. I have learnt that happiness can be found pretty easily, one doesn't even need to look for it--just open your heart and let it flow from all directions. I pray and hope that the allocated ones make fine officers, and go on to contribute towards making Pakistan great in their respective capacities. Your result has given me the closure I needed to move on with my life (and CSS) in the fullest sense. Thank you for that.
