you have aptly summarized the passage but share of last paragraph is pretty minor and most important things in precis are often said either in first or last lines, but this is a very good piece of extract...
I always say that one should use only the words about the meaning of which he is damn sure about, you used inhabit incorrectly here, that can spoil everything good you have done as a bad impression can distort the longer built good one...inhabit means "to live in a particular place"... i think you wanted to write inhibit which means to prevent something from happening...
transition signals must be avoided as we have to limit the precis to 1/3rd so these words can be excessive and we have to use them on the cost of those which are necessary...
and i have made a correction within your para as well, That must have been written as a Determiner is required...

Yes you are right, I wanted to write INHIBIT. Secondly, Thank you for correction and your consideration.

Kindly check this precis ( 2001)

It was not from want of perceiving the beauty of external nature but from the different way of perceiving it, that the early Greeks did not turn their genius to portray, either in colours or in poetry, the outlines, the hues, and contrast of all fair valleys, and bold cliffs, and golden noons and rosy lawns which their beautiful country affords in lavish abundance.

Primitive people ever so far as I know, enjoy that what is called the picturesque in nature, wild forests, beetling cliffs, reaches of Alpine snow are with them great hindrances to human intercourse, and difficulties in the way of agriculture, they are furthermore the homes of the enemies of mankind, of the eagle, the wolf, or the tiger, and are most dangerous in times of earthquake or tempest Hence the grand and striking features of nature are at fist looked upon with fear and dislike. I do not suppose the Greeks different in this respect from other people, except that the frequent occurrence of mountains and forests made agriculture peculiarly difficult and intercourse scanty, thus increasing their dislike for the apparently reckless waste in nature. We have even in Homer a similar feeling as regards the sea,---the sea that proved the source of all their wealth and the condition of most of their greatness before they had learned all this, they called it "the unvintagable sea" and looked upon its shore as merely so much waste lord. We can therefore easily understand, how in the first beginning of Greek art, the representation of wild landscape would find no place, whereas fruitful fields did not suggest themselves as more than the ordinary background. Art in those days was struggling with material nature to which it felt a certain antagonism.

There was nothing in the social circumstances of the Greeks to produce any revolution in this attribute during their greatest days. The Greek republics were small towns where the pressure of the city life was not felt. But as soon as the days of the Greek republics were over, the man began to congregate for imperial purposes into Antioch or Alexandria or lastly into Rome, tan we seek the effect of noise and dust and smoke and turmoil breaking into the natural longing for rural rest and retirement so that from Alexander’s day...We find all kinds of authors---epic poets, lyricists, novelists and preachers... agreeing in the praise of nature, its fine colors and its varies sounds. (Word Count: 410)


Greeks and the Natural Beauty
Greeks had been unable to understand the value of natural beauty; and was reluctant to show it in their art. In today’s world ignorant people also unaware of the natural beauty. In fact, natural beauty was a hurdle for Greeks in many ways and was also a problem for their agricultural growth. Moreover mountain ranges and beautiful jungles further aggravated their dislike towards natural beauty. In addition, it can be imagined that fascinating fields could only find its place in the simplest background of pictures. However, after the industrial revolution which caused pollution problem, people started to feel the importance of natural beauty. Ever since we can find the numerous artist, novelist, writers etc. who praises the external natural beauty. (Word count 120)

These are some grammar mistakes: (apparent ones)
1: Subject verb agreement....Greeks is a plural so it must be followed by plural auxiliary verb.
2: are is required
This is a complete failure dear, i am sorry to say..you didn't get the idea.
the title must be Greek Apathy for Natural Beauty or Heedless Greeks towards natural Beauty:, because your title does not show that the passage is about Greek's disinterest towards natural beauty, rather it says that the have longing for natural beauty so bad impression right from the start of precis...
dear you must have summarized their lack of interest in nature rather than just summarizing the passage...
and in last lines you misconceived the meaning, you said that after industrial revolution, but they actually mean that when Greek city states were abolished and a centralized system of govt was in place when Alexander was in rule....
so at least this precis has gone completely awry, practice more dear...

__________________
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.
But when love is one sided, holding off is no more an option.

Yes you are totally right and I strongly agree with you. For sure il practice it again.

yeah sis keep practicing, a Greek (Aristotle) says, "we are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act but a habit"..so keep practicing and make it a habit to achieve the excellence...I have qualified Combined Competitive exam (PMS) written part, please pray for me....
you also pray for me.....

__________________
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.
But when love is one sided, holding off is no more an option.

Bilal bhai check it out please.

Precis (2003)
If then a practical end must be assigned to a University course, I say it is that of training good members of a society. Its art is the art of social life, and its end is fitness for the world. It neither confines its views to particular professions on the one hand, not creates heroes or inspires genius on the other. Works indeed of genius fall under no art; heroic minds come under no rule; a University is not a birthplace of poets or of immortal authors, of founders of schools, leaders of colonies, or conquerors of nations. It does not promise a generation of Aristotle or Newton of Napoleons or Washington of Raphael or Shakespeare, though such miracles of nature it has before now contained within its precincts. Nor is it content on the other hand with forming the critic or the experimentalist, the economist or the engineer, through such too it includes within its scope. But University training is the great ordinary means to a great ordinary end; it aims at raising the intellectual tone of society, at cultivating the public mind, at purifying the national taste, at supplying true principles to popular aspirations. It is the education which gives a man a clear conscious view of his own opinions and judgments, a truth in developing them, an eloquence in expressing them, and a force in urging them, ft teaches him to sec things as they arc, to go right to the point, to disentangle a skein of thought, to detect what is sophistical and to - discard what is irrelevant. It prepares him to fill any post with credit, and to master any subject with facility. (Word count: 279)


Miracles of Education

Training of the people at large must be the first aim of university; it polishes social atmosphere which, ultimately, perfects the world. It does not guarantee the outcome of legends. However, it happens naturally within its domain. It is a place where the way of outstanding achievements is shown. The core motive of this institution is to purify a society and to aware the people at large. It infuses a new strength in men which helps them to identify the difference between good and evil. Therefore, University prepares men to excel in every walk of life. (word count: 96)

this is a good extract as it clearly manifests the essence of passage in true form, just a little thing, the title is very generalized by you, i think it is not the education in general that is the theme but University education is meant for that...title plays a pivotal role in paving the way to score high, no matter your precis is good or not, but the title must be...yet your precis is good...best of luck and keep practicing...

__________________
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.
But when love is one sided, holding off is no more an option.

Bilal Bhai check this precis please. (1987)

The incomparable gift of brain, with its truly amazing powers of abstraction, has rendered obsolete the slow and sometimes clumsy mechanisms utilized by evolution so far. Thanks to the brain alone, man, in the course of three generations only, has conquered the realm of air, while it took hundreds of thousands of years for animals to achieve the same result through the processes of evolution. Thanks to the brain alone, the range of our sensory organs has been increased a million-old, far beyond the wildest dreams; we have brought the moon within thirty miles of us , we see the infinitely small and see the infinitely remote; we hear the inaudible; we have dwarfed distance and killed physical time. We have succeeded in understanding them thoroughly We have put to shame the tedious and time consuming methods of trial and error used by Nature, because Nature has finally succeeded in producing its masterpieces in the shape of the human brain. But the great laws of evolution are still active; even then adaptation has lost its importance as far as we are concerned. We are now responsible for the progress of evolution. We are free to destroy ourselves if we misunderstand the meaning and the purpose of victories. And we are free to forge head,, to prolong evolution, to cooperate with God if we perceive the meaning of it all, if we realize that it can only be achieved through a whole-hearted effort toward moral and spiritual development. Our freedom, of which we may be justly proud, affords us the proof that we represent the spearhead of evolution: but it is up to us t demonstrates, by the way in which we use it, whether we are ready yet to assume the tremendous responsibility which has befallen us almost suddenly. (Word Count: 299)


Precis:
Title: Role of brain in the Development of World

The tiresome methods of progress have been outdated by the tremendous brain of the human. Categorically, man has defeated the time, space, distance, sound etc. However, the game of development is not yet over. We are the developers, but we would ruin ourselves if we misconceive the true aim of development. In fact, we are still free to move forward provided that we become aware of the importance of ethics and spirituality. In addition, we have mad outstanding developments, but should we confess that progress has also brought us at the lowest ebb is another issue. (Word Count 96)

This is a well job done.....but if you please incorporate "our Responsibilities" then it would even get better.....

__________________
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.
But when love is one sided, holding off is no more an option.