Essay Outline and Introduction:Hurdles in Our Way to Become a Truly Independent State
 

Outline

1-Introduction


A-Truly Independent State defined
B-Thesis statement


2-Hurdles that hinders our way to become a Truly Independent State


A-Absence of Nationhood
B-Absence of National Integration
C-Unstable Political Condition
D-Dearth of Leadership
E-Absence of National Political Party
F-Rise of Poverty
G-Rate of Literacy
H-Economic Stagnation
I-Growth of Population
J-Pluralistic Culture and Social Diversity
K-Weak Law and Order
L-High Level of Corruption
M-Politicisation of administration and Education
N-Violence/Terrorism


3- Recommendations

A_Rationalised Authority
B-Spcialised Administration
C-Socially / politically Mobilisation and Participation of People


4- Conclusion

INTRODUCTION

Truly independent state is a meaningful expression which may be defined from different aspects such as socio-cultural, political, economic, ideological, internal basis and completely free from external pressure.

Internally a state may be considered independent in true sense if it maintain its own socio-cultural value system without any pressure emerging from a society which is pluralistic culturally and diversified socially.Rising population declining literacy, emerging health issues, emerging difficulties in health facilities or such problems which make a state socio-culturally weak in fulfilling its requirement for being independent.

Economy plays significant role i the development of society which ultimately leads to the formation of welfare state either over economic resources or continued economic stagnation makes a state dependable to both internal and fluent community and external economic resources. For example if a state economically weak , it may bent to the economic tycoons for privatisation of institutions and which ultimately may dominate the government affairs making the affairs weak.

Similarly the external resources help makes the state weaker in a sense that it has to surrender many of its national policies making under the influence of the donor country.This makes the state weaker and dependable to greater economic power.

Politically a state remains under the clutches of dependency both internally and externally particularly when it is instable. Political instability may have many reasons such as dearth of leadership , dearth of absence of national political parties, emerging socio-cultural and economic issues , failure of national integration and economic issues and above all continuation of traditionalism based on its political culture and political socialisation. This also makes a state weaker and therefor internally dependent state and dependent state because of its internal forces automatically becomes dependent to externally.

The above analysis therefore shows that weakness of a state make it dependable internally as well as externally hence it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to see its weakness and strengths.

Pakistan may be considered as a state which does not fit into the above framework and therefore stand as not a true independent state.It may be listed as a true independent state with taking its weaknesses which are mentioned above.

good
 

Good effort dear.

Thank you.

[QUOTE=Innocent Heart;927358]Outline

1-Introduction


A-Truly Independent State defined
B-Thesis statement


2-Hurdles that hinders our way to become a Truly Independent State


A-Absence of Nationhood
B-Absence of National Integration
C-Unstable Political Condition
D-Dearth of Leadership
E-Absence of National Political Party
F-Rise of Poverty
G-Rate of Literacy
H-Economic Stagnation
I-Growth of Population
J-Pluralistic Culture and Social Diversity
K-Weak Law and Order
L-High Level of Corruption
M-Politicisation of administration and Education
N-Violence/Terrorism


3- Recommendations

A_Rationalised Authority
B-Spcialised Administration
C-Socially / politically Mobilisation and Participation of People


4- Conclusion

INTRODUCTION

Truly independent state is a meaningful expression which may be defined from different aspects such as socio-cultural, political, economic, ideological, internal basis and completely free from external pressure.

Internally a state may be considered independent in true sense if it maintain its own socio-cultural value system without any pressure emerging from a society which is pluralistic culturally and diversified socially.Rising population declining literacy, emerging health issues, emerging difficulties in health facilities or such problems which make a state socio-culturally weak in fulfilling its requirement for being independent.

Economy plays significant role i the development of society which ultimately leads to the formation of welfare state either over economic resources or continued economic stagnation makes a state dependable to both internal and fluent community and external economic resources. For example if a state economically weak , it may bent to the economic tycoons for privatisation of institutions and which ultimately may dominate the government affairs making the affairs weak.

Similarly the external resources help makes the state weaker in a sense that it has to surrender many of its national policies making under the influence of the donor country.This makes the state weaker and dependable to greater economic power.



Politically a state remains under the clutches of dependency both internally and externally particularly when it is instable. Political instability may have many reasons such as dearth of leadership , dearth of absence of national political parties, emerging socio-cultural and economic issues , failure of national integration and economic issues and above all continuation of traditionalism based on its political culture and political socialisation. This also makes a state weaker and therefor internally dependent state and dependent state because of its internal forces automatically becomes dependent to externally.

The above analysis therefore shows that weakness of a state make it dependable internally as well as externally hence it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to see its weakness and strengths.


Pakistan may be considered as a state which does not fit into the above framework and therefore stand as not a true independent state.It may be listed as a true independent state with taking its weaknesses which are mentioned above.[/QUOTE]

[B][COLOR="Blue"]Well, I try my best to check it. Pardon if I miss something as I am also on the path of learning.
[/COLOR][/B]
2-Hurdles that hinders [B][COLOR="blue"](hinder)[/COLOR][/B] our way to become a Truly Independent State


A-Absence of Nationhood
B-Absence of National Integration
C-Unstable Political Condition
D-Dearth of Leadership
E-Absence of National Political Party [COLOR="blue"][B](To me, point D and E are same because leadership means democratic government and national political party does have a same sense. Avoid the repetition. You have used the word 'absence' thrice. Don't do it, whether it's ideas or words. Try to learn 2-3 synonyms of one word).[/B][/COLOR]
F-Rise of Poverty
G-Rate of Literacy [B][COLOR="blue"](low rate of literacy seems right. Or write 'high rate of illiteracy).[/COLOR][/B]
H-Economic Stagnation
I-Growth of Population
J-Pluralistic Culture and Social Diversity
K-Weak Law and Order
L-High Level of Corruption
M-Politicisation of administration and Education
N-Violence/Terrorism

[B][COLOR="blue"]Add 'chained democracy', 'lack of women empowerment', 'zero accountability' as well.
[/COLOR][/B]

Similarly the external resources help makes/ [B][COLOR="Blue"]help make/help to make[/COLOR][/B] the state weaker in a sense that it has to surrender many of its national policies making under the influence of the donor country.This makes the state weaker and dependable to greater economic power.

Economy plays significant role i the development of society which ultimately leads to the formation of welfare state either over economic resources or continued economic stagnation makes a state dependable to both internal and fluent community and external economic resources. For example[B][COLOR="blue"],[/COLOR][/B] if a state [B][COLOR="Blue"]is [/COLOR][/B]economically weak , it may bent to the economic tycoons for privatisation of institutions. [B][COLOR="blue"]As a result, it may dominate the government affairs that make the decision making against the public interests . [/COLOR][/B]

Similarly[B][COLOR="blue"], [/COLOR][/B]the external resources help makes the state weaker in a sense that it has to surrender many of its national policies[B][COLOR="blue"] (interests)[/COLOR][/B] making under the influence of the donor country.This makes the state weaker and dependable to greater economic power.

Politically a state remains under the clutches of dependency both internally and externally particularly when it is instable [COLOR="blue"][B](unstable). [/B][/COLOR]Political instability may have many reasons such as dearth of leadership , dearth of absence of national political parties, emerging socio-cultural and economic issues , failure of national integration and economic issues and above all continuation of traditionalism based on its political culture and political socialisation. This also makes a state weaker and therefor internally dependent state and dependent state because of its internal forces automatically becomes dependent to externally[B][COLOR="blue"] (external ones).[/COLOR][/B]


[B]The above analysis therefore shows that weakness of a state make it dependable internally as well as externally hence it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to see its weakness and strengths.
[/B]

[B]Put it this way:
[/B]
[COLOR="Blue"][B]Therefore, the above analysis shows that weakness of a state makes it dependable internally as well as externally hence it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to evaluate its weakness and strengths.[/B][/COLOR]

[B][COLOR="Black"]Note:

[/COLOR][/B][B][COLOR="Blue"][B]
It's a good job, indeed. Work hard on sentence structure and vocabulary. Avoid writing long sentences. Write short ones. It will facilitate the examiner. I myself have a same issue but I am working on it. Don't worry you will get command over it, IAT. Avoid repetition of ideas and words. Introduction is short. Add more in it. Work on this essay as well and complete it. Try to make it a bit philosophical. Add relevant quote before the start and at the end as well. It is a good practice. But, be relevant.

Recommendations' part is short. Add more points like 'provision of speedy justice', 'zero tolerance on corruption', 'securing national interests', 'women empowerment' etc. Add transition words like 'as a matter of fact', 'moreover', 'additionally', 'besides' etc in your essay. It makes the writing more beautiful.

Rather typing all this, you should pen it down on the paper and upload its snapshot. It will save your time.

Lastly, you use "in a sense" a lot. Avoid it too[/B] :D

Stay blessed.

Regards,
RMKamran.[/COLOR][/B]

Really good effort RMKamraan,

Thank you brother. :)

Pardon, it is the rectification:

*Chained [B][COLOR="blue"]judiciary[/COLOR][/B].

Therefore, the above analysis shows that weakness of a state makes it dependable internally as well as externally.[B][COLOR="Blue"] Hence,[/COLOR][/B] it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to evaluate its weakness and strengths.

Regards,
RMKamran.

[QUOTE=RMKamran;934195][B][COLOR="Blue"]Well, I try my best to check it. Pardon if I miss something as I am also on the path of learning.
[/COLOR][/B]
2-Hurdles that hinders [B][COLOR="blue"](hinder)[/COLOR][/B] our way to become a Truly Independent State


A-Absence of Nationhood
B-Absence of National Integration
C-Unstable Political Condition
D-Dearth of Leadership
E-Absence of National Political Party [COLOR="blue"][B](To me, point D and E are same because leadership means democratic government and national political party does have a same sense. Avoid the repetition. You have used the word 'absence' thrice. Don't do it, whether it's ideas or words. Try to learn 2-3 synonyms of one word).[/B][/COLOR]
F-Rise of Poverty
G-Rate of Literacy [B][COLOR="blue"](low rate of literacy seems right. Or write 'high rate of illiteracy).[/COLOR][/B]
H-Economic Stagnation
I-Growth of Population
J-Pluralistic Culture and Social Diversity
K-Weak Law and Order
L-High Level of Corruption
M-Politicisation of administration and Education
N-Violence/Terrorism

[B][COLOR="blue"]Add 'chained democracy', 'lack of women empowerment', 'zero accountability' as well.
[/COLOR][/B]

Similarly the external resources help makes/ [B][COLOR="Blue"]help make/help to make[/COLOR][/B] the state weaker in a sense that it has to surrender many of its national policies making under the influence of the donor country.This makes the state weaker and dependable to greater economic power.

Economy plays significant role i the development of society which ultimately leads to the formation of welfare state either over economic resources or continued economic stagnation makes a state dependable to both internal and fluent community and external economic resources. For example[B][COLOR="blue"],[/COLOR][/B] if a state [B][COLOR="Blue"]is [/COLOR][/B]economically weak , it may bent to the economic tycoons for privatisation of institutions. [B][COLOR="blue"]As a result, it may dominate the government affairs that make the decision making against the public interests . [/COLOR][/B]

Similarly[B][COLOR="blue"], [/COLOR][/B]the external resources help makes the state weaker in a sense that it has to surrender many of its national policies[B][COLOR="blue"] (interests)[/COLOR][/B] making under the influence of the donor country.This makes the state weaker and dependable to greater economic power.

Politically a state remains under the clutches of dependency both internally and externally particularly when it is instable [COLOR="blue"][B](unstable). [/B][/COLOR]Political instability may have many reasons such as dearth of leadership , dearth of absence of national political parties, emerging socio-cultural and economic issues , failure of national integration and economic issues and above all continuation of traditionalism based on its political culture and political socialisation. This also makes a state weaker and therefor internally dependent state and dependent state because of its internal forces automatically becomes dependent to externally[B][COLOR="blue"] (external ones).[/COLOR][/B]


[B]The above analysis therefore shows that weakness of a state make it dependable internally as well as externally hence it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to see its weakness and strengths.
[/B]

[B]Put it this way:
[/B]
[COLOR="Blue"][B]Therefore, the above analysis shows that weakness of a state makes it dependable internally as well as externally hence it becomes necessary to examine a state to be truly independent that we analyse its socio-cultural , economic and political abilities on in internal and external basis to evaluate its weakness and strengths.[/B][/COLOR]

[B][COLOR="Black"]Note:

[/COLOR][/B][B][COLOR="Blue"][B]
It's a good job, indeed. Work hard on sentence structure and vocabulary. Avoid writing long sentences. Write short ones. It will facilitate the examiner. I myself have a same issue but I am working on it. Don't worry you will get command over it, IAT. Avoid repetition of ideas and words. Introduction is short. Add more in it. Work on this essay as well and complete it. Try to make it a bit philosophical. Add relevant quote before the start and at the end as well. It is a good practice. But, be relevant.

Recommendations' part is short. Add more points like 'provision of speedy justice', 'zero tolerance on corruption', 'securing national interests', 'women empowerment' etc. Add transition words like 'as a matter of fact', 'moreover', 'additionally', 'besides' etc in your essay. It makes the writing more beautiful.

Rather typing all this, you should pen it down on the paper and upload its snapshot. It will save your time.

Lastly, you use "in a sense" a lot. Avoid it too[/B] :D

Stay blessed.

Regards,
RMKamran.[/COLOR][/B][/QUOTE]
Thaks a lot :)
JAZAK ALLAH
Believe me I have all rules like rule of help , avoid , afraid and so o... in my register I wrote these.
Still committing a mistake..
Kindly share your strategy??? I know I am weak in it... I am trying :(

You are committing mistakes because you do less practice. You should write at least one full length essay per week and get it checked by a good teacher. Last year, I wrote around 3-4 complete essays and I was overconfident that I will perform well in the exam with no practice at all. But, sadly, I couldn't. This happened due to lack of practice. Right now, I am busy in my masters and job so unable to give proper time to preparations. But, what I aspire to do is to work on my grammar and write one essay per week, IAT. This is what you are supposed to do. There is no rocket science in it. All you need to do is to practice and learn those rules that you have written.

Offer prayers as well. It will help you a lot. By the way, there is no rule of 'afraid', it just lies in you. Kill it :pp

Cheers !

Stay blessed.

[QUOTE=RMKamran;934267]You are committing mistakes because you do less practice. You should write at least one full length essay per week and get it checked by a good teacher. Last year, I wrote around 3-4 complete essays and I was overconfident that I will perform well in the exam with no practice at all. But, sadly, I couldn't. This happened due to lack of practice. Right now, I am busy in my masters and job so unable to give proper time to preparations. But, what I aspire to do is to work on my grammar and write one essay per week, IAT. This is what you are supposed to do. There is no rocket science in it. All you need to do is to practice and learn those rules that you have written.

Offer prayers as well. It will help you a lot. By the way, there is no rule of 'afraid', it just lies in you. Kill it :pp

Cheers !

Stay blessed.[/QUOTE]
Afraid of rule ha of ata hai afraid k bad. Yeah true u right I didn't write much essays.I wrote 10-12 full essay.one essay per week is really great. I will follow your advice
Thank you :)
Good luck

[QUOTE=RMKamran;934267]You are committing mistakes because you do less practice. You should write at least one full length essay per week and get it checked by a good teacher. Last year, I wrote around 3-4 complete essays and I was overconfident that I will perform well in the exam with no practice at all. But, sadly, I couldn't. This happened due to lack of practice. Right now, I am busy in my masters and job so unable to give proper time to preparations. But, what I aspire to do is to work on my grammar and write one essay per week, IAT. This is what you are supposed to do. There is no rocket science in it. All you need to do is to practice and learn those rules that you have written.

Offer prayers as well. It will help you a lot. By the way, there is no rule of 'afraid', it just lies in you. Kill it :pp

Cheers !

Stay blessed.[/QUOTE]

I am also practicing essay but after making outline I get confused , what to write and how to start etc and could not write a detailed essay , please guide me in this matter.