I am new here practicing essay .
Beggars are not the chooser...


beggars always implore to others. He consistently wait for someone to give him helping hands . He has to depend on others . He cannot be chooser because chooser makes his own decission based on his own intetest to select the things whereas beggar has to accept what has given to him . Morever , he has to bear humiliation and tauting of people . Everybody sees beggars with contempt . Once begging becomes habbit , it will never fade away .
Pakistan always has begging bowl in its hands . It always implore from IMF , America , Saudia Arabia , China etc . In return , they exploit Pakistan as one can see in case of America when Raymond Davis gunned down two Pakistani .So , America gave money to shut up the mouth of Pakistan . On the other hand , many innocent people are being killed due to drane attack . For this , Pakistan is being paid . In short , pakistan begging bowl is becoming larger and larger day by day .
There are money countries in the world who never ask alms to others . For example , in 2003 Iran experienced earthquack . But it never asked help from other country . In addition , china is the greatest example who never begs to others that is why it is successful .
Pakistan is blessed with many things like four seasons , good land , rivers , natural resourses etc . Inspite of this , it always request others to help . It must not forget that self reliance is the key to unlock the door of success . One should believe in this maximum that help yourself heaven will help you

It takes a lot of courage, hard work, and many sacrifices to reach the pinnacle.

If you are writing about beggars then use “they” instead of “he”. Mention properly what you want to be get checked because essay comprises techniques, grammar, material etc. Look for “models for writers” by alfred rosa, the best book I've ever read. Another site named usingenglish.com is pretty useful if you want your essays get checked by foreign teachers.

"Without courage, wisdom bears no fruit."

bundles of thanks :-)

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In continuation of what has already been said...

> Whenever you prepare for essay, try to make drafts and improve them. This way, your final essay will be grammatically flawless. Vocabulary issues specifically spelling mistakes will be lesser and you will have a better grip over the overall structuring of the essay. Practicing this will so improve your essay writing skills that when the time comes (i.e. CSS Essay paper) you won't need to prepare one or many drafts.

> Focus on grammar (don't burden yourself with the complex grammatical rules - just the basic ones). Basic grammatical mistakes for example mistakes of Subject-Verb Agreement, Tenses, Syntax etc. give a very bad impression of the overall essay. Your attempt has quite a few basic grammatical mistakes.

> Essay is not all about the content that you are presenting. It is equally important that the "tool" (language) which you are using to convey your content is also at-most clear and comprehensible. You may have extraordinary thoughts and ideas but with flawed language you won't be able to communicate those thoughts and ideas to the reader (in this case the examiner) and vice versa (i.e. Having impeccable writing skills and crafty linguistics choices up your sleeve and no worthy ideas is also of little avail).

All the best

Regards

__________________
Conscious does make cowards of us all...

how can I improve ? give me some tips ? can I post my essay here daily ? you people wil help me out ?

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No need to post essay daily indeed you should work hard on syntax and vocabulary. For syntax, as mentioned by the other fellow, work on different structures, read as much as you can and write until you memorized the specific structure. Vocabulary involves idioms, one-word substitution, synonyms etc. The best way to enrich your vocabulary is to make a list of 50 common words that you use mostly and replace them by synonyms.

"Without courage, wisdom bears no fruit."

Answered well be the worthy member

In addition to what has already been said, you may post a refined, polished and well-drafted final version of your essay on - say - fortnightly basis. Remember, in CSS the word limit matters so try to write down essays that are near to the word limit asked for in the examination. Doing so will help you in improving your sentence structure, overall structure of essay, vocabulary, and above all will help you manage the stress of writing impromptu longer essays in real time.

Another piece of advice; try to go through and reinforce the basics of argumentative/persuasive essay writing. Most of the essay topics in CSS are argumentative in nature and argumentative essay has its own technical structuring that needs to be adhered to.

Regards

__________________
Conscious does make cowards of us all...