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  #21  
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Good opinion
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Cold war on 'dear'
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No fight plz...
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Smile Let there be more light in the corridors of worship places...

Let there be more light in the corridors of worship places...it's my very first post at the CSS forum...plz fellows!give my essay some time and rigorsly evaluate my essay as it was my last attempt.rest of my papers went very well.i fear only this paper...i wasted first 45 minutes in making rough outline and the next 45 minutes in writing neat outline.gave only 1.5 hrs to main essay (poor time-management)... didn't even hv the time to re-read it...there might be over all 10-15 grammar, punctuation and spelling mistakes in my essay.sentences were neither very short nor long with few heavy words like malicious,malignant,malevolent and racketeering etc.essay also contained idioms like prey on and bear the brunt of etc...I write in bold and big font but in lingual flow... handwriting is not beautiful...
I attempted this topic with 3.5 pages outline and 6.5 pages essay(too brief) with approximately 1500 words(including those of outline)...
My outline was very long and i couldnt mention all points in the main essay like Yemen war and the need of LEDs in worship places etc...but anyhow... that's how went my main essay.
I...started intro with 3 Quranic verses(eng translation only) which elaborated the meaning of 'Light' in the given essay...no other quotes by famous persons,not even an Hadith.
II...intro was only of 1.5 pages in which I elaborated the meanings of light in form of love,mercy,kindness and guidance etc and then named few pioneers of the world religions and how they used these worship places as their HQs to disseminate this light of love and mercy and at last, ended the intro at the positive note that these places still have the potential to guide the world...
III...Then I went into the past(2 pages) in which I told how these sacred places went into the hands of corrupt people from the sage people with the passage of time and how they altered the sacred documents(another verse quoted here) and how common men felt abhorrence from the name of religion after the consistent looting of Catholics and monarchy in Europe and how Protestants emerged as a result.
IV...Then I came into present and future(2.5 pages) and told how passion rides the reason in such places.discussed the poor economic conditions of imams and pundits and their narrow interpretations of religious texts and how this affects the thoughts of their followers and how as a result,they fall prey to the sectarian and extremist elements...i also mentioned the gender bias practiced at these places and emphasized the need for women participation...at the state level,I blamed selfish politicians for not giving full attention to these places bcz of their other materialistic interests.i also blamed NGOs for not highlighting the issues of worship places at different forums...I suggested that govt should recruit the modern and young scholars who might be well versed in both worldly and religious education.they shd be well paid for their job...i also emphasized coordination btwn CII and Jamia Al Azhar etc regarding the guardianship of these places...also mentioned the Feb,19 visit of Pope Francis to Arab States as good omen,Imran Khan's efforts of mainstreaming seminaries,Suppression of Burmese Buddhists and Tariq Ramzan's sexual scandle at Oxford...also mentioned raping popes of the West and said that Europe,now was bearing the brunt of separating religion from politics in the treaty of West phalia back in 1648...at the end,I also mentioned the bleak future of our coming generations if proper attention is not given to these places...
V..Gave the heading for conclusion (is it a blunder)...my conclusion was only suggestive as I didn't have time to sum everything up again.it consisted of only one long sentence(equal to a para) which asked for the security institute's involvement,more community participation in in these places' affairs,sincere political leadership and inter-faith dialogues...Shujaat Ali...Frank and honest views plz on the chances of getting passed or failed... waiting...
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