Labor saving devices are more troublesome than they are worth.
 

Labor saving devices are more troublesome than they are worth.
Outline.
Preamble:
labor saving devices may ensure rapid progress in work, however, such progress as without human consideration is of no value.
A. TROUBLES CAUSED BY LABOR SAVING DEVICES:
1.laborers are destroyed mentally, morally and physically.
2. Frequent episodes of hunger and humiliation for workless laborers.
3. Erosion of character due to chronic idleness.
4. Death of creative power due to over-dependence on the labor saving machines.
5. Mental chaos resulting from over-indulgence in the labor saving devices.
6. Physical and psychological ailments arising from the excessive use of modern devices.
7. Inhuman, unethical and unjust socio-economic results of the modern machinery.
8. Economic inequality due accumulation of wealth in the hands of a few.
9. Socio-cultural values of the past have been hampered by uneven use of modern machines.
10. Use of labor saving machinery causes enviornmental pollution; e.g cultivation, industry affect enviornment and the quality of life.
11. The labor force in the world today, especially in the third world, suffer from mental, moral, physical and financial problems.
B. THE WAY FORWARD:
1. skill development needs to be prioritised over the use of labor saving devices.
2. Human consideration should be valued more than the adoption of any counter-productive technology.
C. conclusion:

[QUOTE=Metlo;807523]Labor saving devices are more troublesome than they are worth.
Outline.
Preamble:
labor saving devices may ensure rapid progress in work, however, such progress as without human consideration is of no value.
A. TROUBLES CAUSED BY LABOR SAVING DEVICES:
1.laborers are destroyed mentally, morally and physically.
2. Frequent episodes of hunger and humiliation for workless laborers.
3. Erosion of character due to chronic idleness.
4. Death of creative power due to over-dependence on the labor saving machines.
5. Mental chaos resulting from over-indulgence in the labor saving devices.
6. Physical and psychological ailments arising from the excessive use of modern devices.
7. Inhuman, unethical and unjust socio-economic results of the modern machinery.
8. Economic inequality due accumulation of wealth in the hands of a few.
9. Socio-cultural values of the past have been hampered by uneven use of modern machines.
10. Use of labor saving machinery causes enviornmental pollution; e.g cultivation, industry affect enviornment and the quality of life.
11. The labor force in the world today, especially in the third world, suffer from mental, moral, physical and financial problems.
B. THE WAY FORWARD:
1. skill development needs to be prioritised over the use of labor saving devices.
2. Human consideration should be valued more than the adoption of any counter-productive technology.
C. conclusion:[/QUOTE]

[B][COLOR="Blue"]

Aoa,

Despite some loopholes, the outline seems good to me. Here are my following comments:

1.You did not mention “labour saving devices”. N if you did, then you should have mentioned them in the main body as well.

2.Rather penning down sentences, you should have used short words or broke them into 2-3 sub-points.

3. You have missed a major troublesome: cyber-crimes being done through electronic devices: online money laundering –hacking websites cause: - exploitation of privacy - threat to national security and sovereignty.

4. Since this is an argumentative essay, so whether you support or reject it, you should have also penned down a counter argument – the worthiness of labour saving devices – time saving – long-lasting and put less burden on the expenditure due to labour. N since you have supported the topic, so you should have put forward another counter argument to support your argument and counter the worthiness of such devices. In this section, one should be careful in the sense not to repeat the ideas.

5. If I had attempted this topic, I would have been given some examples from Pakistan as well.

6. Your way forward is good but this point could have been added:
- Ensuring the use of environment friendly technology in making labour saving devices

Well, I made two outlines. One on "war on terror" and the second one on your topic but I decided to go with the former. But, I have found your topic the easiest one. I wish you and everybody a warm best of luck. You kindly pray for me as well brother.

Stay blessed.[/COLOR][/B]

[QUOTE=RMKamran;807557][B][COLOR="Blue"]

Aoa,

Despite some loopholes, the outline seems good to me. Here are my following comments:

1.You did not mention “labour saving devices”. N if you did, then you should have mentioned them in the main body as well.

2.Rather penning down sentences, you should have used short words or broke them into 2-3 sub-points.

3. You have missed a major troublesome: cyber-crimes being done through electronic devices: online money laundering –hacking websites cause: - exploitation of privacy - threat to national security and sovereignty.

4. Since this is an argumentative essay, so whether you support or reject it, you should have also penned down a counter argument – the worthiness of labour saving devices – time saving – long-lasting and put less burden on the expenditure due to labour. N since you have supported the topic, so you should have put forward another counter argument to support your argument and counter the worthiness of such devices. In this section, one should be careful in the sense not to repeat the ideas.

5. If I had attempted this topic, I would have been given some examples from Pakistan as well.

6. Your way forward is good but this point could have been added:
- Ensuring the use of environment friendly technology in making labour saving devices

Well, I made two outlines. One on "war on terror" and the second one on your topic but I decided to go with the former. But, I have found your topic the easiest one. I wish you and everybody a warm best of luck. You kindly pray for me as well brother.

Stay blessed.[/COLOR][/B][/QUOTE]

well, if we discuss examples in the body, then no need to mention them in the outline. Secondly, the point of cyber crime is not directly linked to any labor saving device; cyber world is related to communication and thus not with work. Third, when we are required to discuss on the negative side of the issue, then why to give its positve side even in an argumentative essay? We may counter it while discusing in the body, though. Your last suggested point seems worth to have been mentioned.

[QUOTE=Metlo;807775]well, if we discuss examples in the body, then no need to mention them in the outline. Secondly, the point of cyber crime is not directly linked to any labor saving device; cyber world is related to communication and thus not with work. Third, when we are required to discuss on the negative side of the issue, then why to give its positve side even in an argumentative essay? We may counter it while discusing in the body, though. Your last suggested point seems worth to have been mentioned.[/QUOTE]

[B][COLOR="Blue"]You are certainly not asked to discuss the negative side of the issue. It's a statement. You can agree or disagree with it as I said earlier. It's all depends on you. In an argumentative essay, suppose if you reject a particular statement, after highlighting negative points in the start you talk about in favour with positive ones and then again counter these positive points in a different way that should support your prior ones. N the same structure should be followed if you support a statement with some changes.

What I have learned is one should mention the major examples; at least 2-3 with sub-points.

I do not agree with you on these points:

"Cyber world is not directly linked to any labor saving device" n "Cyber world is related to communication and thus not with work"

It's a communication and at the same time it does links directly with computer (one of the major labour saving device).

The topic is about "labour saving devices are more troublesome than they are worth" so taking into account the issue of cyber crime being the major troublesome of electronic devices is worth to be mentioned.

Stay blessed.[/COLOR][/B]

Cyber crime is more related to our misuse of cyber network. It means we ourselves are responsible for misusing it. However, the topic says that labor saving devices cause troubles to us, means we use them for our advantage and still end up on some loss in one way or the other, e.g the use of calculator saves our time but rusts our mental labor.

[QUOTE=Metlo;817057]Cyber crime is more related to our misuse of cyber network. It means we ourselves are responsible for misusing it. However, the topic says that labor saving devices cause troubles to us, means we use them for our advantage and still end up on some loss in one way or the other, e.g the use of calculator saves our time but rusts our mental labor.[/QUOTE]
So you didn't use any sub point in the outline? This outline could be written on a single side of paper. But, I was being told that a good outline is one which is spread on at least 2 pages. The trick I use to incorporate this idea is that I mention even minor details of examples, I will use to support my argument..

Please give your opinion.

Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk

[QUOTE=safeer khan;879229]So you didn't use any sub point in the outline? This outline could be written on a single side of paper. But, I was being told that a good outline is one which is spread on at least 2 pages. The trick I use to incorporate this idea is that I mention even minor details of examples, I will use to support my argument..

Please give your opinion.

Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk[/QUOTE]

it's not the length of outline but the relevance and clarity in your ideas that matter the most in essay.

[QUOTE=Metlo;807523]Labor saving devices are more troublesome than they are worth.
Outline.
Preamble:
labor saving devices may ensure rapid progress in work, however, such progress as without human consideration is of no value.
A. TROUBLES CAUSED BY LABOR SAVING DEVICES:
1.laborers are destroyed mentally, morally and physically.
2. Frequent episodes of hunger and humiliation for workless laborers.
3. Erosion of character due to chronic idleness.
4. Death of creative power due to over-dependence on the labor saving machines.
5. Mental chaos resulting from over-indulgence in the labor saving devices.
6. Physical and psychological ailments arising from the excessive use of modern devices.
7. Inhuman, unethical and unjust socio-economic results of the modern machinery.
8. Economic inequality due accumulation of wealth in the hands of a few.
9. Socio-cultural values of the past have been hampered by uneven use of modern machines.
10. Use of labor saving machinery causes enviornmental pollution; e.g cultivation, industry affect enviornment and the quality of life.
11. The labor force in the world today, especially in the third world, suffer from mental, moral, physical and financial problems.
B. THE WAY FORWARD:
1. skill development needs to be prioritised over the use of labor saving devices.
2. Human consideration should be valued more than the adoption of any counter-productive technology.
C. conclusion:[/QUOTE]

this is the topic and the given outline that i attempted in last attempt and Alhamdolillah passed the css.

[QUOTE=Metlo;887168]it's not the length of outline but the relevance and clarity in your ideas that matter the most in essay.[/QUOTE]
So no need to unnecessarily lengthen the outline.

Please explicitly express that you wrote exactly the same outline there as well , so I may take a comforting breath.

Many thanks. By the way. :)

Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk

[QUOTE=Metlo;887170]this is the topic and the given outline that i attempted in last attempt and Alhamdolillah passed the css.[/QUOTE]

Is this comment directed towards me?

If yes, then thanks.

I didn't notice it earlier.

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