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  #211  
Old Friday, June 02, 2017
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...like...in the wake of 9/11 un took action against taliban and al qaeda rather than state sponsored terrorism like Mossad... thus itself does not possess a clear definition of terrorism.
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  #212  
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Difficulty level is high comparatively in 2016. Examiners are focusing on current affairs rather than stereotype questions asked before. Definitely needed a real good preparation to pass this essay paper.
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  #213  
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I had attempted the same essay. Seniors please check my outline.
Thesis statement: Yes,indeed modernity is an unending process. Human being has been struggling through different ages of civilisation to achieve modernisation. Human beings are working hard enough to fulfil their desire needs and the process will remain constant.
2) Supporting Arguments
2.1) Man is not only bones but a brain.
2.2)UN is the direct offshoot of modernity.
2.3)Globalisation.
2.4)Innovations in the life style.
2.5)Achievements in the fields of science and technology.
2.6)Concept of the modern sovereign states.
2.7)Cruel rituals of different cultures are discouraged.
2.8)Modernisation has put an end to the concept of crusading and invading the weak and poor states.
2.9)Innovations in the field of medicines.
2.10)Modern transport system.
2.11)Women are given their due rights in most of the regions.
2.12)Modern communication system I.e., Social media, cellular networks etc.,
3)Effects
3.1) Social effects
3.2)Political effects
3.3)Economic effects
3.4)Religious effects.... examples given in this regard but I don't remember those...
4)Conclusion:
Note: I appeared for the first time and literally essay paper was tough as compared to the previous years... It was a demanding paper and I had done up to my abilities... anyone among seniors who had attempted this topic must share his/her experience(outline)....
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  #214  
Old Tuesday, July 11, 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nasir khan wazir View Post
I had attempted the same essay. Seniors please check my outline.
Thesis statement: Yes,indeed modernity is an unending process. Human being has been struggling through different ages of civilisation to achieve modernisation. Human beings are working hard enough to fulfil their desire needs and the process will remain constant.
2) Supporting Arguments
2.1) Man is not only bones but a brain.
2.2)UN is the direct offshoot of modernity.
2.3)Globalisation.
2.4)Innovations in the life style.
2.5)Achievements in the fields of science and technology.
2.6)Concept of the modern sovereign states.
2.7)Cruel rituals of different cultures are discouraged.
2.8)Modernisation has put an end to the concept of crusading and invading the weak and poor states.
2.9)Innovations in the field of medicines.
2.10)Modern transport system.
2.11)Women are given their due rights in most of the regions.
2.12)Modern communication system I.e., Social media, cellular networks etc.,
3)Effects
3.1) Social effects
3.2)Political effects
3.3)Economic effects
3.4)Religious effects.... examples given in this regard but I don't remember those...
4)Conclusion:
Note: I appeared for the first time and literally essay paper was tough as compared to the previous years... It was a demanding paper and I had done up to my abilities... anyone among seniors who had attempted this topic must share his/her experience(outline)....
Referring to your essay outline, I would like to share my thoughts about it.
Sorry to say, your essay seems to portray the technological evolution and progress of the human race. That's not what has been asked in the question. Modernity is a world view and it should have been dealt on ideological and ontological grounds. Per question, one needs to identify Modernity as an idea/ideology and its status in the contemporary world. Has it become "an unending project" ? or is there any possibility of its being evaporated/defeated/deconstructed by any other idea/world-view (existing or new) ? It was a philosophical and theoretical proposition asked in the question. In my opinion, you, unfortunately, could not grasp the core/scope of the question. I hope you would consider my criticism in a positive and constructive manner. Thanks

I did attempt the same essay. I briefly remember my outline:

Introduction: Modernity could be an ending project due to natural order of history and its dialectical process

Thesis statement of Modernity: Man is an autonomous rational being.

Brief history and origin of Modernity: Reformation, renaissance, Enlightenment, Romanticism Movements

Display of Modernity as an unending Project:
Concept of Modern State & Hegemonic globalization of Modernity.
Capitalism and economic exploitation of the globe.
Thesis of "The End of History and the Last Man" by Francis Fukuyama

Deconstruction of Modernity: (Referring to the fact that Modernity could be an ending project)
Marxism and its historical materialism.
Deconstruction of Modern Thought and its hegemony..."Specters of Marx" by Jacques Derrida.
Anti-Modernity and anti-Capitalism school of thought...Jean-Paul Sartre, Antonio Gramsci, etc.
Brexit dialect.
USA Elections and its implications.

Conclusion: Modernity is a worldview/ideology. A stronger and popular worldview/idea (new or old) could bring down Modernity. 21st Century events apparently depict the process of ending of the Modernity project. etc.
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  #215  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zarrar Khan View Post
Referring to your essay outline, I would like to share my thoughts about it.

Sorry to say, your essay seems to portray the technological evolution and progress of the human race. That's not what has been asked in the question. Modernity is a world view and it should have been dealt on ideological and ontological grounds. Per question, one needs to identify Modernity as an idea/ideology and its status in the contemporary world. Has it become "an unending project" ? or is there any possibility of its being evaporated/defeated/deconstructed by any other idea/world-view (existing or new) ? It was a philosophical and theoretical proposition asked in the question. In my opinion, you, unfortunately, could not grasp the core/scope of the question. I hope you would consider my criticism in a positive and constructive manner. Thanks



I did attempt the same essay. I briefly remember my outline:



Introduction: Modernity could be an ending project due to natural order of history and its dialectical process



Thesis statement of Modernity: Man is an autonomous rational being.



Brief history and origin of Modernity: Reformation, renaissance, Enlightenment, Romanticism Movements



Display of Modernity as an unending Project:

Concept of Modern State & Hegemonic globalization of Modernity.

Capitalism and economic exploitation of the globe.

Thesis of "The End of History and the Last Man" by Francis Fukuyama



Deconstruction of Modernity: (Referring to the fact that Modernity could be an ending project)

Marxism and its historical materialism.

Deconstruction of Modern Thought and its hegemony..."Specters of Marx" by Jacques Derrida.

Anti-Modernity and anti-Capitalism school of thought...Jean-Paul Sartre, Antonio Gramsci, etc.

Brexit dialect.

USA Elections and its implications.



Conclusion: Modernity is a worldview/ideology. A stronger and popular worldview/idea (new or old) could bring down Modernity. 21st Century events apparently depict the process of ending of the Modernity project. etc.


While your criticism on Wazir's essay is valid insofar as it failed to address the core idea of the essay, and that it should have dealt with modernity as an idea, your own essay is too philosophical and jargonistic for an everyday English professor to interpret and grade. Disregarding the content and inherent merits of your essay, this approach (of using esoteric terminology and ideas) is discouraged in CSS essays. A generalist is marking your paper, and you are to be a generalist throughout your career. As simple as that.

Having said that, your essay is good structurally and in its technical treatment. You show a good command on the discussed concepts. Perhaps too good for this exam. That can sometimes come to bite you. Best of luck though.
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  #216  
Old Wednesday, July 12, 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PartyPooper View Post
While your criticism on Wazir's essay is valid insofar as it failed to address the core idea of the essay, and that it should have dealt with modernity as an idea, your own essay is too philosophical and jargonistic for an everyday English professor to interpret and grade. Disregarding the content and inherent merits of your essay, this approach (of using esoteric terminology and ideas) is discouraged in CSS essays. A generalist is marking your paper, and you are to be a generalist throughout your career. As simple as that.

Having said that, your essay is good structurally and in its technical treatment. You show a good command on the discussed concepts. Perhaps too good for this exam. That can sometimes come to bite you. Best of luck though.
Thanks for your feedback...PartyPooper

What would you propose "to address the core idea of the essay" ?
I would be glad to know your opinion on this topic. Waiting for your precious response...
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  #217  
Old Wednesday, July 12, 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zarrar Khan View Post
Thanks for your feedback...PartyPooper

What would you propose "to address the core idea of the essay" ?
I would be glad to know your opinion on this topic. Waiting for your precious response...


The bit about not addressing the core idea was meant for Wazir. I think you have addressed it amply. The issue with your essay is that it is too philosophical and uses heavy jargon. That's the downside (perhaps the only downside, and maybe the decisive one, God forbid). I have heard professors saying that they penalise those who fail to keep essays general.
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  #218  
Old Thursday, July 13, 2017
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Default I request partypooper and other worthy members to give it a read

TOPIC: More and more international Military Engagement by the UN; is the world moving towards peace


1) Introduction

We the people of United nations affirm to prevent the scourge of war, which twice in our life time has brought untold sorrows to the mankind..”—UN Charter Preamble

Thesis: United Nations, despite its increasing international military engagements, has not been able to ensure peace. And has belied the essence of its charter.


2) Brief Overview of International military engagements by the United Nations

3) International military engagements by the United Nations and peace

4) How Despite increasing international Military engagements by the UN world is not moving towards peace

(4.1) Plight of Syrians continues unabated despite increasing international military engagements by the UN
(4.2) Yemen crisis continues to fester and the peace still remains elusive despite international military engagement by the UN
(4.3) China remains undeterred in South China Sea
(4.4) Despite UN’s involvement in Israel, Israel continues to expand its settlements in Palestine, which has resulted in intermittent clashes between the warring parties
(4.5) Other UN’s military engagements and their failure
(1) Peace keeping mission in South Sudan
(2) Peace keeping mission in Columbia
(3) Peace keeping mission in Central African Republics (CAR)

(5) Why despite UN’s increasing international military engagement world is not moving towards peace

(5.1) UNSC represents old geopolitical power balance, which affects its effectiveness
(5.2) Disunity among its veto-wielding Permanent members
(5.3) UN’s State-centric approach affects its ability to address contemporary challenges, which are largely intra-state
(5.4) Organizational inefficiency and Weak position of UN Secretary General

(6) How Can United nations be reformed to ensure peace in world

(1) Reforming the structure of UNSC in accordance with contemporary geopolitical realities
(2) Restrictions on the exercise of Veto
(3) Revamping the organizational structure to reclaim its efficiency
(4) De-politicization of the post of Secretary General

(7) Conclusion
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  #219  
Old Friday, July 14, 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PartyPooper View Post
The bit about not addressing the core idea was meant for Wazir. I think you have addressed it amply. The issue with your essay is that it is too philosophical and uses heavy jargon. That's the downside (perhaps the only downside, and maybe the decisive one, God forbid). I have heard professors saying that they penalise those who fail to keep essays general.
Thanks. How could one try to be "generalist" when there is no other option than to treat the subject with its ontological and theoretical debate using the proper terminology (condition of the discourse) and jargon ? Anyway, your feedback is encouraging. You are the only person I came know who understood this essay question. Have you appeared in CSS Exams ? Thanks
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  #220  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mohammed Uzair View Post
TOPIC: More and more international Military Engagement by the UN; is the world moving towards peace


1) Introduction

We the people of United nations affirm to prevent the scourge of war, which twice in our life time has brought untold sorrows to the mankind..”—UN Charter Preamble

Thesis: United Nations, despite its increasing international military engagements, has not been able to ensure peace. And has belied the essence of its charter.


2) Brief Overview of International military engagements by the United Nations

3) International military engagements by the United Nations and peace

4) How Despite increasing international Military engagements by the UN world is not moving towards peace

(4.1) Plight of Syrians continues unabated despite increasing international military engagements by the UN
(4.2) Yemen crisis continues to fester and the peace still remains elusive despite international military engagement by the UN
(4.3) China remains undeterred in South China Sea
(4.4) Despite UN’s involvement in Israel, Israel continues to expand its settlements in Palestine, which has resulted in intermittent clashes between the warring parties
(4.5) Other UN’s military engagements and their failure
(1) Peace keeping mission in South Sudan
(2) Peace keeping mission in Columbia
(3) Peace keeping mission in Central African Republics (CAR)

(5) Why despite UN’s increasing international military engagement world is not moving towards peace

(5.1) UNSC represents old geopolitical power balance, which affects its effectiveness
(5.2) Disunity among its veto-wielding Permanent members
(5.3) UN’s State-centric approach affects its ability to address contemporary challenges, which are largely intra-state
(5.4) Organizational inefficiency and Weak position of UN Secretary General

(6) How Can United nations be reformed to ensure peace in world

(1) Reforming the structure of UNSC in accordance with contemporary geopolitical realities
(2) Restrictions on the exercise of Veto
(3) Revamping the organizational structure to reclaim its efficiency
(4) De-politicization of the post of Secretary General

(7) Conclusion

I request you all to please give it a read and apprise me with your feedback
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