Originally Posted by newstudent

@Shahid Shakoor

You have written a very good introduction. I appreciate that. Regarding your grammer and sentence structure; Some comments:

Your 1st para reads: "The very word Islam means peace. It is a religion of peace and love. The cardinal message of Islam is love and fraternity, peaceful relations with all, honoring of pacts and treaties and no aggression. Islamic theories prevailed peace and love over the world. All the towering figures of Islam followed the golden principles of Islam and spread the message of Allah through out the world. Islam is entirely incompatible with terrorism. Islam has facilitated a Golden age of scientific discovery all over the world. It is only Islam which tolerate to all other religions."

1. See the first sentence "The very word Islam means peace." The second sentence goes "It is a religion of peace and love."

In the first sentence it seems you are clarifying Islam meanings as word, it comes to reader's mind that you may go to explain its meaning further, but in the second sentence you are giving its meaning as a religion.

A better strategy would be that, if you were not going to explain Islam's meaning as a word, to try to bring its new dimension by giving its other meaning. For example you might have stated "The very word Islam means peace. As a religion, its message is also peace and ....."

2. You said "Islamic theories prevailed peace and love over the world."

What kind of theories Islam gives? you may clarify, for example its social, economic or political. A better sentence would be "Islam has provided basic guiding principles, which call for peace and harmony not only among its believers, but also .....".

These are minor points, but it may greatly improve your style of writting. Try to read your essay as a reader and ask question to yourself, that what a reader is expecting after this sentence and answer that question from your reader perspective.

Brother Raz has given you nice hints, try to incorporate those too.

Regards