I told it earlier that I am not an authority in expansion. You better get your expansions checked by some senior and expert fellow.
Revolution Vs Evolution
CE 2013
Revolution is changing a current system to bring a new one,
while on the other hand (use one conjunction) Evolution is a
(continuing) continuous process. Revolution is the name of throwing out a government, system or an idea for its defects so that it can be replaced with a new one which is likely to improve the state of affairs, while in evolution we let the system work
(I think evolution is an automatic process...) and we hope that the
(continuing) continuous process will bring the necessary changes in that system and it will keep improving with the passage of time.
(you are under a wrong impression that long sentences do any good to expression. In fact they make the conveyed ideas vague. As a general rule, a good english sentence should be of 15 to 30 words.)
Revolutions most of the times bring sanguinary conditions, blood is shed and so many a people lose their lives.
John. F. Kennedy says that "Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make the violent revolution inevitable". French Revolution is a great example and so is Bolshevik revolution of Russia in 1917. The governments were ousted as
a result of a coup that brought the new governments. Sometime
s these revolutions achieve their targets but most of the times these are hijacked by the prominent leaders who establish autocratic rules of their own as did Lenin.
on the other hand Evolution takes time to bring the changes that are necessary for that system to work properly. It tests the patience of the people but the fruits of patience are always sweet.
(Do we really wait impatiently for evolution?) We have the example of England where never in its long political history we see a revolution, there has been only one, 1688 revolution which is called The Glorious revolution, no blood was shed. The UK has no written constitution but the evolutionary process has
(made) given it a dynamic constitution and
the people of
the UK are loving it!
So we see that Revolutions do not always achieve the very purpose rather bring more trouble
while on the other hand (use one conjunction)evolution is not an immediate remedy but it is more useful in the long run.
Overall, you write good.