I don't know how you people are going to take my words, But, I am really thinking about this:.]
Ehm ! Personally I am taking your words simply serene and trying to answer as good as i can....So stop thinking about what other feel about your words (as some may mock your words)..and adopt a positive minded approach till u reach ur optimum state of mind.. from negative the state of mind u r in right now. Take a pride in what you have learned so far from ur studies..
Tip NO:1 : Problem with you is that you care more about the negativity of others about and about ur results, and less about your mental health and its state..First and Foremost thing which can fuel ur mind is that u need to be "Yourself." ...it means u need to stay committed to your work, boast ur mind with good thoughts and finding natural beauty in potential and what u can do...
Tip No 2: wear the boots and cloths of those who want and do criticize you..i mean take there criticism positively and as a force to boast ur confidence..
For example if one of ur your family members, friends, CSS mates or any other person ..Criticize that u r incompetent and don`t have the potential to avail what u r striving for and s/he even adds that u `ll become Mad for becoming a CSP and advice u to leave it (here you need to smell whats the motive behind that criticism..mostly jealousy you can smell there)....
Here I ask you can a real well wisher , really educated and qualified individual can discourage you..obviously the answer is "NO"..if such people were really your well wisher,though would well cultured ,well educated they would fully aware of what there citicism can do to a less confident and vulnerable aspirant of CSS, they `ll never criticize you if they would aware of its impacts..insead fully aware people if not jealous of you . `ll say things in your favour and your desire of becoming a CSP..
I "advice" you and "device" you with one thing in here ...that find out the difference between those who criticize you, and your own self..if you absorb what they say as ignorant people ..then its dead sure that being an Aspirant of CSS U`v leanred nothing so far from ur studies, and have not yet awakened your mind which is the first thing you need to knock the door of CSS exam with fistfull desire of becoming CSP..So be firm in faith in God, solid in determination to your work....not caring about the negativity of others when its against you.. care about your health and mind and keep maintained ur studies and become mentally aware to the extent you can at utmost.....
CSS is not a game of incompetent people..and only the result can`t realize one is competent or not..if u find ur self fail in ur first attempt...second attempt is never gone....In case u do not even pass CSS in any of all the three attempts..u would have learned so many things which `ll help u live a life better than u can have as a civil servant..The books u study for CSS i don`t think can only cater Civil Service Exam ...its an asset for the rest of your life..So don`t use ur studies just for scoring a goal of CSS...Each year we see only the available seats of CSPs are assigned to candidates who stand out the most deserving.
after failing CE-2014, how would I justify my failure to everyone around?
*Smiles for this Question *and I answer with justification that u have no need to justify your failure ,the way you want..."Failure is already a justification itself as a step towards success"..if u fail once u strive to study more deeply ..no matter track is of CSS or you adopt any other course of career in case becoming a CSP is not in your destiny....
So the way you have to justify your failure , if u feel there is still a need of it to justify, then u have to maintain that first attempt realized how much more u need to study ...thoough CSS is an unpredictable game..but easy for those who understand how to beat CSS.
I don't know how would I make everyone understand, that I had this and that problems before and after exams, and this led to my failure
As you said "This and that problems after and before exam" ..reflects blatantly clear excuses..after exam problems has nothing to do with your result of CSS...and in case of having problems before exam ..If u mention those problems for your rescue from criticism...instead u can point out no one helped u solving ur problems u had which were stopping u from good studies.
Tip No 1 : So avoid excuses next time and stop being a procrastinate ...beat the excuse and make beneficial use of tiime.
Tip No 2.: Always keep asking for help both offfline and online, if possible, because at this stage study is more important for u than u solving ur problems and giving importance to ur problems instead of ur studies.....Ur state of mind also reveals that U find asking for help derogatory for urself..So always ask for help in a safe way..which simply means u are giving importance to a person u asking for his/her help when u find it easy and comfortable..and in return s/he finds it comfortable to help U in as easy way as possible....when u r in pleasant state of relationship with that particular person or have soem traces of overlap in relationship/link...(Remember rare people bother themselves for others to help them..its upto u how much u bring them near to urself and make them feel owned..)
Everyone around would ask about my result. I don't know how would they think about me--maybe this, that I am incompetent and I can't ever pass this exam
Answer :Look at urself with ur eyes not with the eyes of others..U r not bound to anyone who criticise you negatively ..u are an independent person and always u need to "be yourself"...Do u think what you think about others who are confident and have faith in themselves can affect them..Answer is "NO" .if ur thoughts can not make other feel different then why you should take the impression that what other people think about you..and No one has a constantly free time to think about you..always take the benefit of negativity.
Tip NO 1: All You need at this point is to feel happiness in accepting yourself what you are and to develop ur self-confidence.
Tip No 2: Easily develop self-confidence with starting from knowing your priorities as per the need of time..like currently ur first and foremost priority is to use ur mind for the studies of CSS and not for what people are and `ll think about you.
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Furthermore, I don't want to justify myself
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Listen ! When u don`t want to justify yourself..here you finding yourself that you are independent and responsible person for what you do...When u have the courage to not justify urself to others ..then u must develop the courage to discover and know your true self persistently.
nonetheless, there are some, whom I need to give justification. I need to take them in confidence that I will make it in my upcoming attempts
Plus adding that from ur current attempt u leanred the level of ur studies and how much u need more to study deeply..
But here I am confused, that how would I do this. How would I take them in confidence?
only way to take other in confidence is speaking the truth..no matter how much bitter the truth is,..its real taste appears in gripping the confidence of others..here you may face criticism but take it positively when u take nagative impression of things as unconsciously as a human being..Use always ur conscious mind..as i said with an example above ,a way to benefit from negative criticism.
Reply seriously without making fun out of this please, otherwise don't
Answer.I think I have answered as per the need of your request/questions/help.
God Bless You..
Thanks for sharing what you are passing through ,in a safe way,..
Regards