I am gradually coming back from the trauma FPSC gave me on 26th of October 2015.
Depth of sorrow and anger in mind restrained me to write anything on the forum after the result despite of being an active member.
I have much to say but ill shorten my experience.
My journey ended on 26th with no plausible results as i became victim of destruction.I started it back in 2013 when i gave the best possible attempt failing preci exam by 4 marks.
After the result i became more enthusiastic leaving no stone unturned i gave 2014 exam and i became target of FPSC,islamiat being the reason.
Till this result i had lost 2 permanent jobs,3 lucrative opportunities and loads of hopes to become what i had dreamed off.
I became jobless and penny less.By hook or crook i got a job but the goal of css exam did not pardoned me.This landed me in 2015 exam.I used to silently prepare for the exam during the 12 hour job routine with psychological stress of not earning "much".
This time FPSC taught me that i do not have writing skills as per their desire.
[U]Critical Analysis
As per my perceiving)
The exam:
There is nothing bad in the exam itself. 12 papers with 6 compulsory subjects make it an effective yard stick to judge ones caliber and potential.Vastness of syllabus and critical questioning make it an exam of the highest standard.
The Issue:
The problem starts with the checking and marking process/procedure.There is no definite marking theme or set of rules to evaluate a candidate especially in Essay and Composition exam.
Proof :
I cleared Essay exam in 2013 exam when over 90% failed in that particular exam.
I cleared the same in 2014 quite easily.
I cleared PMS essay exam with 60 % marks same year.
The the irony,
Suddenly FPSC realized that i have lost my essay writing skills and i have lost critical thinking ability with no sense of narration.
Why it is so?
The answer is:
FPSC sets instructions to examiners and work on region/quota system to give proper representation to all provinces.They wont mind failing hundreds from the same center in order to compensate the few which they desire.It would not be sarcastic to comment that they may have guideline not to pass more than 20 candidates from Rawalpindi region for instance.The other 700 people may ruin their lives burning their permanent opportunities for the sake of temporary exam.
Lessons Learnt:
1.Meritocracy prevails in CSS but to the extent of mood,mindset,guideline and "subject hitting" tactic of FPSC.
2.The exam is not wholly solely based on how much a candidate prepared but to a larger extent on:
a.The candidates opting that particular subject;
Rule :More the candidates opting that particular subject high will be the marking standard.
b.Syllabus is just an eye wash for some optional subjects like journalism/public administration.
c.Same material that was written for a particular question in previous exam may not fetch similar marks this year.
3.Work hard but pray more.
4.Pray even more if you are from highly urbanized city like lahore,Rawalpindi,Karachi.
5.No one will believe that you have all those set of skills necessary to clear the exam unless you are a pass candidate.
6.Give the exam and leave it on Allah.Utilize every opportunity you get in your life without thinking about the result.
Ending Theme:
I am not dejected neither i will curse FPSC for everything,I am hopeful about other possible opportunities life shall provide me but CSS exam taught me what my leader says:
"Allah nay Insan k hath may sirf niyyat or koshsish rakhi ha kamyabi woh Deta ha"
Advise:
Attempt the exam and give your best but dont ever take it to your heart,you will die.....
PS:Who ever says that CSS exam is free of the Luck factor can freely contact me.ill relate people with examples who took guidance from me and cleared the exam.( May Allah allocate them).