Hey Hazelnut,
I write almost the same way as you. Conventional style also bores me and I am more interested in reading narrations/unconventional styled stuff than conventional paragraphs.
I am glad you started this post cause I was wondering about the same thing.
I haven't attempted css yet so I can't say for sure, but there are all sorts of examiners who check papers. In my university, for instance, some teachers were only after the ideas of students and how strong their arguments were regardless of how simple/complicated their sentence structures were and some were interested in how many statistics can one student churn out in his essay (which turned essays more into statistics reports). So everything is on the table and yet not on it. (Schrodinger style)
I am trying to ask some English teachers what they think about essays, whatever I find, I'll post it here.
@exclusively, This is not my style of writing. However, I agree with wandered. While reading your paragraph, I had to pause at few points and re-read sentences.
For instance, "weed out earthquakes" is wrong. (
http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/weed+out) It doesn't work here. Prevent is far better.
Wandered suggested rest of the issues.
Hope it helps.