Dear Maha, It is a good attempt either it belongs to you or not.
Ideas are better but words need to be re arranged. In the the following places it is out of pattern(be wazan).
.........ﻣﯿﺮﮮ ﮨﺮ ﮐﻞ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺷﺎﻣﻞ
ﻮ
ﺗﺐ ﺳﮯ ﺍﺏ ﺗﻠﮏ ﻣﺠﮫ ﮐﻮ........

Remain blessed.