Well, please see my CE-16 outline. Though, I have already shared this but it was in hurry and I wrote it just after essay paper. I made few blunders in spellings in rush hence, please go through this below outline and you would see substances in it.
Your essay is good enough to tempt the examiner and my point of view may not necessarily reflect examiner`s mindset. In-fact, i shared my opinion on the basis of my 3rd CSS attempt and I clear English Essay in my second attempt with 45 Marks.



CRISES OF GOOD GOVERNAMCE IN PAKISTAN: NEED FOR REFORMS AND INSTIUTION BUILDING

“Missiles can kill terrorists. But I am convinced that good governance is that what will kill terrorism”
United Nations
Secretary General Ban ki Moon

Outline :-
Introduction:
1) Pre-requisite of Good Governance
1.1) Consensus Oriented
1.2) Accountability
1.3) Transparency
1.4) Responsive
1.5) Equitable and Inclusive
1.6) Effective and Efficient
1.7) Follow the rule of law
1.8) Participatory

2. Crises of Good Governance in Pakistan
2.1) Loopholes in criminal Justice system
2.2) Obsolete Police Ordinance
2.3) Slow implementation on National Action Plan
2.4) Lack of coordination between institution
2.5) Clash of media and dismal role of PEMRA
2.6) FATA Reforms and flaw in Article 247 (3) and sub section (7) of Constitution of Pakistan
2.7) Inefficient Public institution and lacking adaptation technologically
2.8) Public schools and no follow up on Article 25-A (Free education) in Pakistani schools

3. Need for Reforms and Institution building
3.1) Revamp Criminal Justice system
3.2) Capacity building of Police and reconsider obsolete police ordinance
3.3) Promote coordination and cooperation between institutions
3.4) Participation of people in national matters viz-a-viz foreign policy etc
3.5) PEMRA must be vigilant and censure glorification on banned outfits
3.6) Inviolability of constitution particularly related to masses must be feasible
 Article 25, Equality of citizen
 Article 3, elimination of exploitation
 Article 34, Full participation of woman in national life
 Article 37 promotion of social justice and eradication of social evils
 Article 33 parochial and other similar prejudice must be discouraged
3.7) Tax collection must be regulated and sources of funds should be monitored as per section 165-A, income tax ordinance 2001 to abstain suspicious transaction reports.
3.8) Renovate public schools and highly trained teachers should be recruited on merit
3.9) Uniformity on national curriculum swiftly implemented for future coexistence and peace

4. Conclusion:

“To make this great state of Pakistan. We should wholly and solely concentrate on the well being of the masses and especially for the poor and you are free to go to your temples, mosques and churches in this great state of Pakistan”

QUAID E AZAM MUHAMMAD ALI JINNAH
Ended with quote and wrote 10 and half pages including outline