Let there be more light at the corridors of worship places
 

Let there be more light at the corridors of worship places
1.Introduction

2.Major religions of the world

3.Role of worship places and religion
3.1 to promote peace
3.2 social harmony and solidarity
3.3 merges differences
3.4 promotes social values

4.what actually worship places are doing?
4.1 promoting ethnocentrism
4.2 Sectarianism and extremism
4.3 Terrorism

5.Examples of religious persecutions
5.1 Myanmar Case
5.2 Palestine Issue
5.3 Yemen crisis

6.Let there be more light at the corridors of worship places through
6.1 By promoting pluralism
6.2 Love of humanity
6.3 Following true aspects of religions
6.4 Conflict resolution through mediation
6.5 Culture of love and peace
6.6 Respecting opinions of others
6.7 Preventing violence

7.Conclusion

i have no hope of clearing CSS-2019 essay. Almost, all my papers went exceptionally well except International relations. IA, i will clear all subjects but i am totally uncertain about my essay paper. nonetheless, i shared the outline. it is exactly the same outline which i produced in the exam hall. grammatical mistakes are minimum with two or more spelling mistakes. total pages written: 14.5
total number of words= 29 lines*14.5pages*6 words (avg)
=2523 words (expected)

InshaAllah you will succeed!

That is a good attempt though you have missed some areas but still it is worthwhile.

[QUOTE=askedon;1089624]That is a good attempt though you have missed some areas but still it is worthwhile.[/QUOTE]

Could you please point out what you think is lacking? I've written on this as well and would like to get your opinions. Thankyou

Seniors and juniors please [U]brutally[/U] assess! - Let be more light...
 

[B]Intro[/B]
The corridors of worship places today will be traversed by those who will usher the nation into the corridors of power tomorrow. Worship is a sanctimonious deed; worship places, even more so. Large segments of our lower and middle class society have, ever since the 70s, come under the shadow and pale of a distorted ideology. This was originally devised to counter what was deemed at the time a threat to the existence of the entire country. However; today this mindset has become ingrained and etched into our thinking. This, to the extent that our responses have become inebriated in that most of us have no qualms over lynching a man upon mere heresay.
[B]Outline[/B]
[U]Prevailing situation [/U]
1. Loudspeaker hate culture
2. Rigid mind-set under the garb of being staunch
3. Above point eventually turns into intolerance towards others
[U]Implications[/U]
4. On the brink of abandoning religion like Europe did with Christianity when Church couldn’t reconcile science with religion
5. Lack of compassion
6. Rise in crime
7. Deprived from the rewards and dividends of practicing true religion
8. Breakdown of society in a nation bound and united solely by religion
[U]Factors[/U]
9. Binary conception of heaven and hell
10. Poverty leads to asymmetric perception
11. Prevailing elitist ostentation dikhawa culture antagonizes lower-class
12. Lack of actual manifestation of religion in society leads to dearth of actual role models (hence groping in the dark for a leader figure to follow)
13. Some elements posing as highly religious ¬¬—confounding those who follow them
14. Segregation of religion from visual arts leading to inability to grasp abstract concept

[U]Conclusion[/U]
The prevailing attitude towards and by worship places holds tremendous potential to enlighten the masses and shine the light on the way paved for their progress. Every member in society must pause and reflect on their current bearings in wading the waters of religion. Man has a tendency to subvert to his will any and everything to satisfy his never ending animalistic desires. It is the suppression and positive channeling of these instinctive impulses that informs our very humanity as being worthy of superseding the angels in magnanimity and loftiness.

[QUOTE=Acidius;1092855][B]Intro[/B]
The corridors of worship places today will be traversed by those who will usher the nation into the corridors of power tomorrow. Worship is a sanctimonious deed; worship places, even more so. Large segments of our lower and middle class society have, ever since the 70s, come under the shadow and pale of a distorted ideology. This was originally devised to counter what was deemed at the time a threat to the existence of the entire country. However; today this mindset has become ingrained and etched into our thinking. This, to the extent that our responses have become inebriated in that most of us have no qualms over lynching a man upon mere heresay.
[B]Outline[/B]
[U]Prevailing situation [/U]
1. Loudspeaker hate culture
2. Rigid mind-set under the garb of being staunch
3. Above point eventually turns into intolerance towards others
[U]Implications[/U]
4. On the brink of abandoning religion like Europe did with Christianity when Church couldn’t reconcile science with religion
5. Lack of compassion
6. Rise in crime
7. Deprived from the rewards and dividends of practicing true religion
8. Breakdown of society in a nation bound and united solely by religion
[U]Factors[/U]
9. Binary conception of heaven and hell
10. Poverty leads to asymmetric perception
11. Prevailing elitist ostentation dikhawa culture antagonizes lower-class
12. Lack of actual manifestation of religion in society leads to dearth of actual role models (hence groping in the dark for a leader figure to follow)
13. Some elements posing as highly religious ¬¬—confounding those who follow them
14. Segregation of religion from visual arts leading to inability to grasp abstract concept

[U]Conclusion[/U]
The prevailing attitude towards and by worship places holds tremendous potential to enlighten the masses and shine the light on the way paved for their progress. Every member in society must pause and reflect on their current bearings in wading the waters of religion. Man has a tendency to subvert to his will any and everything to satisfy his never ending animalistic desires. It is the suppression and positive channeling of these instinctive impulses that informs our very humanity as being worthy of superseding the angels in magnanimity and loftiness.[/QUOTE]

Brother, im an aspirant like you, not a pro. so here's my view:
First, your expression is really amazing. Loved it.
Second, avoid using "pronouns" in the introduction.
Third, your Introduction seems to be unclear. I cant comprehend what stance u have raised? (kindly clear that).
Fourth, outline even does not hit "Let there be more lights in the places of worship." What's your take about the topic should be clear. Think more!
Thanks, hope that u take it in positive direction.

Thankyou very much for the critical feedback
the intro does appear hazy, agreed.
It appears I'm weak in comprehending the topic and expanding thereon. Will have to look up some 'ways of brainstorming' lectures.
Do suggest any tips if you have em ready at hand!
Thanks again

Sent from my XT1058 using Tapatalk

[QUOTE=Acidius;1092899]Thankyou very much for the critical feedback
the intro does appear hazy, agreed.
It appears I'm weak in comprehending the topic and expanding thereon. Will have to look up some 'ways of brainstorming' lectures.
Do suggest any tips if you have em ready at hand!
Thanks again

Sent from my XT1058 using Tapatalk[/QUOTE]

Brother, this doesn't mean your "weak." Just practice and read first about topic. you will the hit the target.
first, read about topic. And ponder over "why, how, what" about the topic.
Plus, next time post your essay-related in this thread:
[url]http://www.cssforum.com.pk/css-compulsory-subjects/essay/essays/123970-lets-prepare-essays.html[/url]
So, other members could shed light too.
Thanks,

I'm an engineering student and want to improve my writing expression including vocab and sentence structure for my essay. Kindly help me out.
Whenever I try to write on any topic and I'm like blank. How can I improve myself.
Any tips and tricks are appreciated.
Thank you!

Sent from my Redmi Note 4 using Tapatalk

Nice