Hi every one.I have a physical disability which is stammering.Guys believe me this handicapp made me sick of life.Im currently 27 years old and doing law and appeared in css exam twice.Since my childhood my life had been like living in hell.All my life i have been a laughing stock of my family and friends.Due to this i lost all my self respect and confidence.Now im a full adult with no confidence,motivation and self belief in life.I spent most of my life alone segregated from rest of the society.I dont have any friends but only few from my childhood.Even my family members taunted me about this and forced me to speak clearly.They said why u avoid people and why dont u look into their eyes.I lost my two css attempts becz i was hopeless frm the beginning.Now 2012 would be my final one im not hopeful even now.Plz tell what do with my self becz due to all this i could not concentrate on my studies.Is thier any way out!If any.

Dear frnd & brother!!!
Just believe in God & u will be succeeded Insha Allah. Do hard work.... And keep in mind that it is more action than talking.... u are a talented guy . i hope u understand.

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''Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any one thing''

bhayya have you consult any speech therapist?i hope a speech therapist will help you a lot.in a TV programme i watch two person who are young and doing their job and carry study they said they are member of stuttering association in pakistan ,you can search it in you tube. when you contact such persons and share your priblems they can guide you and your confidece and self respect will resume .may ALLAH bless you . in fact i m preparing for teacher in special education school .in syllabi these terms are included .so i searched in youtube difference b/w stuttering and stammering but i could not find .

AoA
I am amazed at the behavior of your family and friends.....they should have encouraged you.Its true when you are made fun of you lose confidence but losing hope is not at all a good thing.Look at you 27 ,doing law and CSS aspirant ...this shows your talent. People will always discourage you whether you have a disability or not,its your dedication that will keep you motivated...dont let it die.Hard work will pay you well believe me it does.dont listen to what ppl say ,dont be hopeless stammering is not such a big deal ,i have seen very confident ppl stammer at times.You can always polish your communication skills,it takes time ,if you start working on it...within a year or so you will see the difference.
Best wishes.

Bad attitude

Well..Tooba is right,visit a speech therapist.

Besides,I will suggest that you should do speech infront of a mirror.Trust me,it will lessen your hesitation and will help you in attaining confidence.
I'm a debater.Once my professor came to me with a shying guy of 2nd year and asked me to help him in preparing "speech".My Sir told me in a low voice that the boy stammers and his main purpose isn't to make him a debater but to make him confident.I guided him;where to raise his volume of voice and where to lessen,etc etc.We encouraged him as he was shying.He was asked to memorize the "speech" and to practice it infront of a mirror.Believe me after few practices no one could say,he stammers.He got confidence to do speech fluently infront of girls(Me and other friends)
If you don't have interest in speech/debate then please read a paragraph from your book,viewing your image in the mirror.
Don't hesitate to face yourself while speaking(In a mirror) and you will become able to face the world Insha Allah.

People make fun?
Avail your last chance of CSS and show them,where talent speaks,your voice is the highest

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Love is my Shield,Truth is my Sword,Brain is my Crown,Smile is my Treasure and I'm a Queen;
Quitters never win and Winners never quit..!!!

I can feel what it can be like. I used to stammer when I was a kid.. a lot! Alhamdulillah I got rid of that on my own. You just need to understand why you do that. Mostly kids start stammering when they're under stress. It can be anything like peer pressure or something as simple as thinking that you would not be able to convey your message while speaking. These psychological reasons are very much similar to the ones causing other issues like that (bed wetting for instance) unless it is a physiological issue of course (like many people suffer head injuries and start stammering.)
If it is a psychological thing, let me assure you that you can get rid of it very easily. Like in my case, when I grew up a little, I tried to figure out why I did that (with the help of my parents and siblings of course.) Most people who stammer subconsciously fear rejection. They somehow believe that their words won't be heard and nobody will pay attention to what they say. In order to compensate for that, they subconsciously try to speak hastily (they just try to get it over with if you know what I mean.) By doing that, they refuse to acknowledge that their thought process fails to keep up with their words, so they stammer! You'll see that most of the people who stammer (due to psychological issues) try to speak hastily and in a hurried manner.
You just need to slow down buddy and realize that your words are precious! Have faith in yourself and have some self confidence. You're the best believe me! As Farrah said, you need to practice in front of a mirror as you utter your words. I mean talk to yourself.. I used to do that all the time when I had this problem. I also used to repeat the words that I was about to speak in my mind... slowly and calmly! For the time being, you just need a couple of good close friends you can confide in. They should make you feel comfortable with how you speak. They should remind you time and again to speak slowly and help you with your practicing. Wish you all the best regarding this my friend. You can always contact me through email and I'll be more than glad to help.

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...and I am the dark of this our new day

I feel for you dear.Just trust in Allah and burn mid night oil on these 5 steps.You will feel the difference inshAllah.


1. UNDERSTAND YOUR STAMMERING HABITS

The very first step to get rid of stammering is by knowing what exactly makes you stammer. Do you repeat sounds (s...s...s...supper) or syllables (su...su...su...supper)? Or do you prolong sounds (sssssssupper)?or Do you get blocked in speech so that you are unable to make any sound (s...upper)? You also need to consider what you feel about your stammer. Do you think it is severe or quite mild? Is it better in some situations and with some people? How do you feel when you are stammering: embarrassed? Annoyed? Frustrated?

2. TACKLE YOUR STAMMERING Having analyzed your stammering habit, tackle it one element at a time, starting with something you feel you might be able to change. For example, you might take one sentence of your speech two or three times a day and make a special effort to say that sentence slowly and calmly. Do not allow yourself to rush or panic when speaking more slowly, most people do less of stammering.

3. DO NOT BE AFRAID TO TALK IN PUBLIC You have probably adopted some avoidance behaviors to hide or avoid your stammer. The problem is that the more you avoid, the more you need to go on avoiding. . Your stammering does not improve or go away because you hide it.

4. KEEP YOUR EYES AND EARS OPEN Watch and listen carefully when people are speaking on buses, on radio phone-ins, at home and in shops. Is everyone as fluent, concise and articulate as you imagined? You may discover that many apparently fluent speakers are, in fact, quite hesitant when speaking, and that there is not such a clear division between speaking fluently and stammering. You may then begin to accept that you do not have to be fluent all the time.

5. Practice: Practice is the key to get rid of stammering. Take your time to speak rather than rushing. Speak a bit more slowly. Be patient with yourself and say what you want to say, pause for a moment before you start to speak. Do not force the words it just makes them harder to say. Always remember, only you can help yourself! These tricks to avoid stammering are often hard work, and when you do not work, they do not help.

Regards,

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When you try, you risk failure. When you don’t try, you ensure it.

Only you could imagine of what your passing through but your desperation is not justified. Look at those who couldn't speak at all, look at those who are blind, look at those who don't have limbs and IshaAllah you will find courage.

You are doing law and apperared in CSS it means you accomplished a lot. You proven yourself bigger than your problem, so keep going and don't be desperate, believe in God you will succeed inshaAllah.

From medical point of view, either its cureable or not. You must consult a good speech therapist as suggested by the Toba and Farrah.

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“There is no God but You (Allah Almighty), You are far exalted and above all weaknesses, and I was indeed the wrongdoer”. AL-QURAN

look what you have and compare it what you have not.you will find Allah has blessed you with beauty;beauty of wisdom and education.each of us have deficiencies.fact is they are concealed.so do not under estimate yourself.if you have some fault,than tell me any one who is without this.when people are mocking over you than face the situation.they will use to ...but if you go on hiding ,this will provide them a chance.look you are mirror of your parents,they have too suffer when people taunt them regarding you.so never go against them if they are wrong,this will lead you in wrong direction.only advice is to FACE AND FACE
FACE!
EVEN OTHER HAVE TO FACE!
YOU WILL BE RECEIVED
THEY WILL THAN DENIED
AND.............
JUST CHILL

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"Wa tu izzu man-ta shaa, wa tu zillu man-ta shaa"

kabhi ap ne socha hai why r u born with stammering? because Allah has planned to test your guts through it. and you are lucky, that it is not that big a problem. I had a classmate with same problem but he only smiled back, and uska mazaq urane wale kabhi na kabhi thak he jate the! but he didnt get fed up smiling

Look at those who can't speak at all, who can't walk at all, who can't even see the beauties of world! aise logon k liye to zindagi puri aik imtihaan hoti hai,

but tell u a golden rule! ENJOY ur life without any care for ur disabilities. Come on, thats the way you are! and its cool when you accept your shortcomings the way you accept ur strengths!

confidence, socialization, friends.... yeh sub ap ka qasoor hai. ap khud nahi bn'na chahte kisi ka dost, u r afraid of ur stammering that it will give others a chance to make fun of u. trust me, log itne bure nahi jitna hum perceive krte hain, bus thore nonsense hote hain, for that just forgive them but dont make ur own soul suffer.

rahi baat CSS ki to dear, dunia CSS pe khatam nahi hoti. jin ko stammering ka problem nahi, woh b fail hote hain. yaad rakhain, chot khaye beghair koi bhi element khoobsurat nahi ban sakta. CSS nahi to na sahi, woh krain jo ap ka dil chahta hai, that makes you feel less tensed. woh profession, woh line jo ap ko khushi daiti hai. u knw what I am saying? something that gives you a feel of accomplishment.

Lastly, be incharge of your own happiness and do not let others dictate when u have to be happy or sad! for that, you have to make your MIND be the incharge of your HEART. do it in literal sense, dil ko samjhate rahain time to time, and keep your mind focused. Stammering is no big problem, visit a speech therapist and hey! stammering is cool

God bless you!