Quote:
Originally Posted by hazelnut
It was a serene morning. The people were following their normal routine unaware of the impending doom. Suddenly, the earth started shaking. The forceful tremors baffled everyone and no one knew what to do. The lethal jolts were increasing in intensity. And as they came to a halt so did the life! Within seconds, everything was devastated. There was wreckage everywhere. Thousands were dead, all the structures fell to the ground and there was no one to help. It felt like the end of times was here. But then as the news of the catastrophe spread, gradually the saviours started coming to rescue. The question here arises that when will we as a nation learn disaster management? It’s not a secret anymore that Pakistan is vulnerable to natural disasters. The hapless nations loses hundreds of precious lives and millions of rupees to the natural disasters every year. Yet the frequent earthquakes and the annual floods always catch us off guard. Only because our level of preparedness is miserable. The institutions created to deal with natural disasters are at loss. They not only lack the administrative capability but also the funds to deal with the humungous task at hand. Moreover, the colossal loss of life and property even after working out national strategies are the proof of ineffectiveness of these strategies. Thereby, it is indispensable to reform the national strategy. We will have to learn to work with nature rather than fighting against it like China did. We will have to abandon futile measures like constructing embankments and dikes. Instead, we should adopt sagacious initiatives like planting trees, relocating our population and stop polluting the Mother Nature. In short, it’s an irrefutable fact that Pakistan is susceptible to the natural disasters. So if we want to erect an effective defence, an alternative and more holistic approach is an indispensable requirement.
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Overall good attempt. Highlighted things below are heinous blunders in the Essay. Please replace first person pronouns with third person.
1) Only because
our level of preparedness is miserable.
2)
We will have to learn to work with nature rather than fighting against it like China did.
3)
We will have to abandon futile measures like constructing embankments and dikes.
4) Instead,
we should adopt sagacious initiatives like planting trees, relocating
our population and stop polluting the Mother Nature.
5) So if
we want to erect an effective defence, an alternative and more holistic approach is an indispensable requirement.