Plz Seniors Check my outline of the following essay.
Is my format correct?????

The Power of Media in Modern World

A) Introduction: Media wields a significant power in modern world

B) Factors contributing to the emergence of a vibrant media
i) Sustained struggle by journalistic community
ii) Vehement support of civil society
iii) Sound financial position of media groups
iv) Tremendous advancements in technological sphere

C) Contribution of strong media towards society
i) Custodian of fundamental human rights
ii) Influential in policy making process by governmental authorities
iii) Promotion of democracy by inculcating political awareness in masses
iv) Commendable role in war on terror
v) Instrumental in promoting national integration
vi) A great source of entertainment


D) Unjustified use of this power by media
i) Sentimental approach on sensitive issues
ii) Preference to commercial interests over national ones
iii) Partisan role of media houses
iv) Making wedge between Islam and the west wide

E) Suggestions to make the use of the power of media desirable
i) A well thought out self made code of conduct by media organizations
ii) Enhanced role of the editorship
iii)Recruitment of only properly trained journalists

F) Conclusion: Media enjoys a tremendous power in modern world and its role in the dispensation of its duties largely remains admirable.

Here I explain few of my points briefly


Sound financial position of media groups
The sound financial position of media groups have let them work according to their policy without relying on govt or other forces . Hence they have been able to not giving them any concessions while doing their duty of watchdog.

Tremendous advancements in technological sphere

First of all use of fast means of communication. T.V Radio , fax , Internet etc
Owing to these advancements , media groups have prospered and have been able to work more boldly. For instance, Geo's transmission was stopped going air in Musharraf era. But thanks to technological advancements, Geo was able to get its transmission on air from Dubai.
Moreover in recent days, wikileaks was not allowed to continue its website from old server. But , owing to advancements in technology, it put its website on other server.

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Thanks Allah

Brother!

a remarkable effort i must say. well here are a few tips/observations.

The beginning of the essay serves as an introduction to the topic. by introduction we don't only mean to define the topic or give a brief outline but also the definitions of the entities involved.

as an example in your case the following words have many aspects/dimensions:

1- Media: Print, Electornic or Radio.
2- Power: Ability, Rule, Influence, Affect etc etc.

now to the examiner media may mean many things. to you it may mean only print or only electronic. similarly to him power may mean to alter the lives of common man (for good or bad), to you it may only mean the toppling of governments.

now coming to the point, my assertion is that you never let a loose end in your introduction. you better restrict the examiner/checker in the first paragraph. always define the terms in your first paragraph. so work on that.


Secondly, it's better to include a prologue or an introduction to the topic as something seperate to the definition of the topic. for example, before starting with your first paragraph you give a catchy sort of a paragraph defining the need for this argument or what purpose would this essay serve. now this is not conventional but it is something that may enable you to stand tall amongst the thousands of other candidates..

Wishing you the best of luck for your future forays into the world of Civil Services

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Umar Abbas Babar
I Know I am Bad But When Bad is the Best, Bad is the Only Choice