But i found grammatical mistakes such as you wrote india as he but remember that country should be considered as she

aslamualikum dear bunko
..well ur attempt is good at least u can pass ur essay paper inshallah but to me there are certain suggetions that can help u ..as once u also asked weather it was important to provide an essay with head line...answer is Absolutily not it would give u negative marking... while writing essay u've to become a lawyer in a court room defending ur points definatly u'd argue and counter argue than prove ur point of view ..examiner is a person who dose not know anything abt the topic like a jugde ..so it is ur responsibility to present infront both side of coin the darker side must soon be replaced with brighter side or one that ur trying to focused on ,like you can say ..the jehadi organizations and those who are deseminating the seeds of extremism disguising their agenda with apparent motive to implement the justics in the society,so the peaople are ready to respond their call even the literated one, they justified in their efforts on account of islamic ideology as it is based on justics..however islam dose not promote bloodshed to establish justice in the society .the only way to rootout the dirty plant from its root is to implement justice,socio-economic justics to rescue the moribund society of Pakistan,sadly enough it is only lack of justics that made innocent people extremist .it is one of the cruel fact that our education syst.....AND THE STORY 'would go on....
regards

PLZ find my faults and tell my strengths.
essay out line.

Topic:
Future of democracy of pakistan.

1.Background
2.Democracy?
3. Pakistan's democracy.
4. Factors that led to the derailment of democracy.
a. POwer greed.
b. Bad politics.
c. tribal mindset.
d. amending constitutions.
e. foreign involvement.
f. Institutional clashes.

5. Leadrship faults.
a. power greed.
b. corruption.
c. leg pulling.
d. ineffeciency.
e. lacking leadership qualities and statmanship
f. narrow vision.
g. puppets.

6. Impacts on country of fragile democracy.
a. unstability and insecurity
b. terrorism.
c. chaos.
d. fear of military intervention.
e. bad image of pakistan internationally.

f. receding economy
g. inflation.
h. development projects snails pace.
i. sectorwise progrerss standstill.

7. Hopes.

a. democracy on the move.
b. free judiciary.
c. free media.
d. reconcilaition.
e. optimism a head.

8. Recommendations.
9. conclusion

__________________
"Always try to prove that you are right but...
never attempt to prove that others are wrong.."