@Imdad Khan
Imad Khona Char Day karay day!!!...
its very similar to mine...nice work...satisfaction??? ummmm even i am not satisfied and i believe no body should be....there is always a room for improvement...but that was the best that you or we could have done at that time...keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best....if your English was more than okay and there is not tactical flaw in the essay flow....passing marks should not be a dream...inshallah... |
Please Comment.... I May Have Missed 2 or 3 more headings that I Don't Remember now ! It Was 20 Pages And Writing Was Kind Of Mismatching At The Last Pages As Compared To first Pages !
Introduction Harm From Religion Since The Dawn Of Mankind Religion - The Origin Of Discrimination Why Religious Discrimination Is Worst Than Color Discrimination ? Terrorism Origin Of Civilizations From Religion Clash Of Civilization Preserving Promotion Wars & Battles In Groups & Out Groups Help Reason For Our Origin Ways Of Life What Can We Do To Avoid Clash Elimination Of Problems Is Atheism Better Than All Religions ? Conclusion |
@ brother ali
Although i have not attempted this essay (for reasons that it a touchy issue) i will briefly give an outline about your strengths and weaknesses...basically this concept revolved around the theory of "clash of civilizations" and you have discussed it thats great...
check out your essay for yourself: 1- did you discuss the need for religion?? i don't think so....you will be marked down for it. 2- how did the number of different religions get the people to fight eachother...?? according to me, that will be a too strict interpretation by some against the lenient interpretation...did you discuss it??? 3- did you discuss that religion and the followers of a religion are different entities....i.e the followers acting bad may not suggest that the religion is flawed. 4-the clash of civilizations is a flawed theory..did you discuss its flaws... 5-did you discuss the many common points that the religions have placed us....for example the unitary of God in all forms of religion (although with different names)....the important of good etc.. you see an essay demands us to touch both the aspects....if you start with a verdict from the very go and stick to it without giving some space to the opposite views, you are landing yourself into trouble...!!! P.S religions don't make civilizations....civilizations have religions...there is a difference....there is nothing called Islamic Civilization....only regions define civilizations which have religions of their own....for example the Mesopotamia civilization was in Mesopotamia...it had different religions at different times...the Nile Civilization had different religions at different times...the latest being Islam.... |
[QUOTE=umarabbas;173427]@saba
Dear...yours was a nice effort but, i am afraid, in the wrong direction. it would have been a marvelous effort if the essay was on title of terrorism and its implications or anything similar.. in your essay the word dialogue barely seems to come out in the limelight.. though i am not an authority and your effort was a pretty nice one...the reason i dropped it out was that it was vast, and i thought it would be attempted by many...:P yeah i wanted to go for this topic in a cynical fashion.. i mean criticizing the society for its negligence of basic rights for men, women, chidren, elderly let alone the third gender....then found it too repungent :P[/QUOTE] you are absolutly right. I thought I would come to the topic dialogue for combating terrorism after constructing a ground with proofs of failure to combat it with use of force, in doing so, i couldn't manage the time, and it took me to a never ending rout. though, i did it well to convince the assessor, but am not optimistic myself. so leave it, i learnt a lesson for next. still begging for 40 marks.....heheehe regards and best of luck. |
[QUOTE=umarabbas;173545]Although i have not attempted this essay (for reasons that it a touchy issue) i will briefly give an outline about your strengths and weaknesses...basically this concept revolved around the theory of "clash of civilizations" and you have discussed it thats great...
check out your essay for yourself: 1- did you discuss the need for religion?? i don't think so....you will be marked down for it. 2- how did the number of different religions get the people to fight eachother...?? according to me, that will be a too strict interpretation by some against the lenient interpretation...did you discuss it??? 3- did you discuss that religion and the followers of a religion are different entities....i.e the followers acting bad may not suggest that the religion is flawed. 4-the clash of civilizations is a flawed theory..did you discuss its flaws... 5-did you discuss the many common points that the religions have placed us....for example the unitary of God in all forms of religion (although with different names)....the important of good etc.. you see an essay demands us to touch both the aspects....if you start with a verdict from the very go and stick to it without giving some space to the opposite views, you are landing yourself into trouble...!!! P.S religions don't make civilizations....civilizations have religions...there is a difference....there is nothing called Islamic Civilization....only regions define civilizations which have religions of their own....for example the Mesopotamia civilization was in Mesopotamia...it had different religions at different times...the Nile Civilization had different religions at different times...the latest being Islam....[/QUOTE] Thanks So Much For Pointing Out Errors , I Couldnt Be More Grateful :) Brother , As I Said I Forgot Few Points In Outline And After Reading Ur Reply I Have recalled Few 1. yes I Placed It As .... Dawn of Mankind & Need Of Religion 2. There Are Many factors for this , Y people are fighting now over the religion ? Christians Say 'Mother Of God' Muslims Say God Is Alone . Hindu Worship Cow As God Muslims Eat It .. Back In Jainism , they used to fight Because jainism said eliminate The PHOOTA ( Other Religions) So there Is Always A Fight With Many Religions be it verbal or physical 3. I Gave Another Outline For Fundamentalism :) And I discussed How Christian Fundamentalists Have Controlled Latin Side 4. Yes Sir , This Was Not To Be Missed 5. Exactly Sir , Under The Topic Of Help From Religion.. And I Agree It is not an easy essay as from my class out of 10 guys only i attempted this but i felt i had strong points. I gave references from Prophet(pbuh) , ferro period, Jainism , Bhuddism ........ And I Couldnt Disagree more with u sir even though u have solid point. Civilizations Adopt religion. The bhuddist religion is a combination of different philosophies and the teachings of Gautama !! Thanks for ur time , I Really Appreciate it :) Points Welcome ! :) |
@ali
Thank me not yaar!!! now you have elaborated your outline and it seems to be a damn fine essay en....although i would still differ on quite a few points but over all this is above an average attempt...keep it up brother.. BOL for the upcoming papers and wish ya the best!!
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@ Floudian
Dear please can you share your outline. @ Hunain Masha Allah your outline is immensely rich in content. You must have studied the major world event. I hope that your effort is equally rewarded. Best of luck. |
Essay outline!
A.A hey dearies i attempted an essay on the same topic i.e RELIGION has done more harm than good to human relations"...mine essay was a strenous effort as it was about 57 pages long...i didnt draw any margin lines and my handwritig aint much wide...
outlines were 29-m just giving a gist ov them over here... RELIGION-a narration of the term religion-an enduring legacy a saga that is many a thousand year old an analysis ov the world religions FROM hu-TAAH ov egypt to QURAN...GOD the desire ov all! an endeavor for peace PEACE A wish of all world religions reason ov the clashes-IGNORANCE clash ov civilizations-origin,narration n flaws from bernard lewis to sam huntingn-more realism than truth existentialism-that takes to religion humanism-the legacy ov each faith terrorism-an outcome ov ignorance NOAM chomsky illustrates the altered religious percepas man is prone to error error in understanding-leads to conflict islam-a humanistic phenomena religion-a search for peace religion-not at fault human intellectual erroneos perspectives-reasons ov the harm conclusion-reason ov conflicts,sorrows n disastrous deeds is ignorant human mind religiond bears no fault! so people,there were many other as well-dnt remember thm all...3 pages were for them n 54 for their elaborations!///..please do comment n pray!::) regards ayezza! |
@lubna
sorry dear....i thought i had done that....well both your's and saba's mistakes are identical...too much of terrorism and little about dialgoue...but the good part about yours is that your discussed dialogue in the beginning....inshallah that shall fetch ya gud score....IF you have given its examples, for instance the Ireland and UK dialogues, dialogues between Pakistan and Tehrik-i-Nifaz-i-Shariat-i-Muhammadi or dialogues betweeen Hamas and Israel or even dialogues between the NATO and Taliban in Afghanistan...!!!
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[QUOTE=umarabbas;173308]i have attempted...
Can woman be equal to men in Pakistan? I have written on these lines: What is equality? How is equality achieved? Prevalent two different views about equality of women and men 1- Islamic View 2- Western View Differences between the both. Women's present plight in Pakistan Causes for these conditions What are the Government's recent steps towards equality of gender Conclusion[/QUOTE] I think you have not concentrated word "CAN" that much. You must have given the arguments in favour of the statement (Yes women have that potential putting forward the recent history's evidences from pakistan, and jotting down the latest developments) or against it (women dont have that much capability as yet, proving how our social,religious and economic constraints have come in their way) Over all, you essay seems good but slightly off the topic... |
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