I wish I could give up hope.
Every moment is different.
Every moment is a new decision.
Hope at front
And running from despair,
When will this contest end?
Am I scared?
Scared of what?
Is it love or is it ego?
What is this that does not let go?
Are these the bells of doom, in the far away distance?
Am I whining?
Should I?
Where will the journey end?
Or will it crash on the rocks?
But no.
It all will end well.
However it ends
It all just ends well.
No matter what who says.
It all just ends well.
And that is something lovely.
And hate able at the same time.
Sometimes I wish there was no hope at all.
Sometimes I wish darkness would engulf me completely.
But even if I allow it to, it just can’t.
And that is so fucking sick.
I don’t want to become a tragedy.
And yet here I am.
I am still breathing.
And I don’t want to die anymore either.
I wish I would wish to die again.
I wish I would let it end.
I wish I could stop struggling.
I wish I could give up hope.