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Faded Shadow!
Faded Shadow! I see you there but you refuse to see me to you I am an faded shadow opposite of who I used to be. I now feel erased from your mind and soul knowing I am not in your heart makes me incomplete from whole. I wish there was a new beginning for everyday that we live so that we could forget the past and have a fresh start to forgive. Its hard trying to move on without you at my side I want to tell you how I feel but instead its something I got to hide. I made so many friends but its just not the same it doesn't feel right without you and it makes me feel lame. You were once my everyday star I looked up to you for answers but now I don't know where you are. I don't know what burned you out but your light has fallen from skys it has made everything in my world go dark and everything I know a lie. I search for the answers but it is something I never found no matter how hard I looked the answers were never around. I changed so much without you that I don't even like "the me" I feel like a completely different person and a person that I just don't want to be. Everyone says its better this way but in my heart I just don't believe it screams out to me to keep trying never to give up until I fail to succeed. I'm totally lost on whether to turn left or right God gave me two opinions but I can't see without my light. She helps me through when I am stuck but now she is gone and I am out of luck. I always thought it would be a guy to be the one to break my heart but this time it was my best friend because we are always now apart. All the time she rolls her eyes at me when she catches me trying to look but she doesn't understand what I am searching for because a piece of my heart is what she took. She ripped herself away and I didn't even understand why but I took to long to show a reaction so she decided it was time for goodbye. Goodbyes is the one thing that hurts its what makes you want to cry everyday it makes you wonder if you could of done something to prevent it in some kind of way. Where is God when I ask him if he's there I can't see him but in my heart I know he cares. I love you lord and I know what happens, happens for a reason so I trust you lord to forgive me for being selfish instead of pleasing! I hate myself for not seeing things before its to late but my own problems blinded me and now I have to live with this fate. |
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Faryal Shah (Monday, October 06, 2008) |
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