Climate change is the biggest threat to Pakistan

Thesis statement:
The severity of climate change related threat can be gauged from the fact that Pakistan is the fifth country affected the most by it.

2. Climate change: a real threat to Pakistan:
3.1 Considerable increase in weather patterns i-e Heat waves, severe storms, heavy downpours etc claims several lives every year.
3.2 Floods and droughts cause unplanned migrations.
3.3 Massive migrations can result into social disruption.
3.4 Rising sea level and subsequent sea intrusion is claiming thousands of acres of coastal land.
3.5 Mangrove forests are fast disappearing.
3.6 Glaciers are fast melting, resulting in permanent reduction in river flows.
3.7 Climate induced shrinking arable lands have resulted in food insecurity.
3.8 Millions of species are at the brink of extinction and thereby a big loss of biodiversity.
3.9 Air pollution: smog and its associated health issues.
3.10 Forest cover is depleting at an astronomical pace.
3.11 Climate change poses a serious threat to nation’s economy.

4. Drivers of climate change:
4.1 Rapid industrialisation
4.2 Excessive emission of greenhouse gases and global warming
4.3 uncontrolled deforestation
4.4 Excessive use of vehicles and non-renewable fossil fuels.
4.5 Urbanisation
4.6 Excessive production of non-biodegradable waste.
4.7 Population explosion

5. How to combat climate change in Pakistan:
5.1 Pakistan must embark on low carbon and climate compatible development.
5.2 Mass plantation drive across the country should be launched.
5.3 Proper waste management strategies should be devised.
5.4 Switch to renewable energy resources.
5.5 Paris agreement and other climate related resolutions must be implemented in letter and spirit.
5.6 Banning diesel vehicles in the mountains as they accelerate the glaciers melting.

Conclusion

The examiner will give you less than 40 marks for this attempt. So you've failed this attempt. The question statement of this essay is "Climate change is the biggest threat to Pakistan". The question prompt for this essay is "of all the threats facing Pakistan, list the REASONS YOU think CLIMATE CHANGE is the BIGGEST of them all". In no shape or form, does the question ask you for "Drivers" and "Combat" talking points of Climate change. Failing to distinguish between the question and the question prompt, is the biggest reason why candidates fail.

You only need to write 8 to 15 talking points under "2. Climate change: a real threat to Pakistan". That is it. No Drivers No Combat points. Just threat points.

3.2 and 3.3 are the same
3.5 to 3.7 is grammatically incorrect
3.8 to 3.9 are sentence structure wise uneven

Last point, no need to write complete sentences or large phrases in outline. Stick to 2-3 words or small phrase not more than 8 words. If you can do all of this, then you can score 40 or 45 marks on your current level of Written English ability. This is more than enough for CSS candidates. You know alot about this issue, you just needed push in the right direction.

PS. The thesis statement is correct but it doesnt relate to your points mentioned below it.

__________________
Humein kya. Tumhein kya. Ap ko kya.

Your TS is correct but its a bit weak in a sense. Add a assertion to make it more convincing.

Heading #3 is right and relevant but sub-heading 3.11 is ambiguous. Write how it pose threat to economy. Be clear.

Certain sub-headings in #4 are irrelevant and vague. Since the topic mentions Pakistan so your entire essay must justify the fact of climate change in Pakistan. For this 4.1 is irrelevant because Industrialization merely contributes to Pakistan's climate change. We lag in industrialization.
Global warming in fact is result of climate change not its cause. #4.2
#4.7 is unclear in its conveyance of your idea. Raises questions. make it clear.

P.S., instead of starting new thread for each essay kindly use this thread created for the same purpose:
http://www.cssforum.com.pk/css-compu...ml#post1113519

Hope it helps!