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#1
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My outline for Essay-2015
The War on Terror has contributed to the growing abuse of Human Rights.
Introduction: .(Started with) A scene of torture experiment to introduce helplessness in dogs in CIA lab -the same principle was applied in torturing suspects in Guantanamo.(as exposed in recent reports of Prisoners abuse).Introduction .Body .Introduction to human rights in light of 1948 deceleration..Way forward .Solution to the problem .Role of USA.Conclusion |
#2
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The first half of your body is totally irrelevant. They have asked something else and you have given something totally different.
The middle part of the body is the only relevant part. I just hope and wish you luck, because I think one cannot prove or disprove in so few an arguments the proposition given in the title. Lastly, the spelling of the unstable Chinese province is "Xinjiang", though it is pronounced "Sink-yaang".
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xishan (Friday, March 13, 2015) |
#3
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Quote:
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#4
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What do you think about this approach? |
#5
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Guyz keep one thing embedded in ur minds, in essay you are addressing an issue and no issue can be addressed without doing the cause-impact-remedial analysis. Apart from that, wish you best of luck
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The arrogant (Friday, March 13, 2015) |
#6
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A lot of aspirants have opted "Terrorism" as their essay. In my opinion, when an examiner reads the same thing again and again, he becomes less interested in later papers and awards less marks; points-out more mistakes. Also, some may have written excellent essay on terrorism; stating accurate facts and figures etc. Those, who have written an average essay on the same topic are then overshadowed and likely to get less marks. Plus, many of the aspirants would have gone out of track while mentioning human rights abuse; instead they had written root-causes, origin etc of terrorism. Thus, the terrorism essay may not pass many of the aspirants.
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#7
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Quote:
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مجھے ہے حکمِ اذاں |
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The arrogant (Friday, March 13, 2015) |
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#9
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Loveu Bartowski, do you see this in my Essay?
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#10
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Xishan, there are 4 basic components of an Essay. First you have to identify the issue, i.e. what the issue really is, what problem examiner wants to get resolved. Secondly, you go for the extent of the issue, that how broad the issue is, its scope, area, various facets and probable ramifications. Third you identify the root causes and Fourth includes the recommendations for their solution. Your essay covers somewhat the first, second and fourth portion but you have totally missed the third one, as I already said you can't address an issue until you recognize the root-causes. And here the causes would not be for terrorism but that why War on Terror is resulting in Violation of Human Rights. It would involve the violations from both sides. For the West the probable reasons are their hegemonic designs, still following modern ethos of conflict and not complying with the Post-modern ethos of compromise, their dual standard, islamophobia and xenophobia etc. And as far as the other party is concerned, illiteracy, socio-economic injustices, no participation in decision making process, cultural invasion, extremism etc has added to the problem. And keep one thing in mind, there are multiple ways of passing an essay, you can never limit your scope but atleast your essay should include all the basic elements and should explore major relevant facets.
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