plz check my expansion

ufaq.memon · #1 Sunday, October 10, 2010

all members of the forum are requested to plz check my expansion/paragraph and point out weaknesses in order to improve my writing skills.

Eventually all Human Action must be judged by its moral contents
Human actions are the main identity of human conduct. The world is abound with many vices and due to the materialistic approach of the people, human actions are mostly in conformity with customs of the society. These customs are the approved standards of morality enacted for the self-interest, therefore, their violation brings animadversion of the whole society. Morality is considered as a code or principle deals with right and wrong or good and bad behavior. Therefore, it is always argued that all human actions must be judged by its moral contents rather than customs prevalent in the society.
In a world in general and Pakistan in particular human actions are inclined towards customs prevalent in the society. Whenever, a renowned personality or a person affiliated with a political/religious organization is killed, the violence erupts which leads to the loss of several lives and property. It is due to the leaning of people towards customary morality rather than to act deliberately by keeping in view the moral values and responsibility.
Hazart Muhammad (PBUH) lived an exemplary life and the whole life was comprised of love and obedience, complete trust and thoughtfulness, peace and appreciation. In his whole life, whatever, he seemed wrong he openly denounced and forbade people, however, he always enjoined people to adopt altruistic approach. His behavior with the people raised him to the exalted position among people and not only friend but also foes praised for his conduct. Resultantly, due to his noble behavior, Islam flourished by leaps and bound as actions speaks louder than words.
The world is replete with many vices and due to materialistic approach; the societies have developed customary morality in order to safeguard their interest. Therefore, there is no denying fact that all human action must be judged by its moral contents.

usman khalid · #2 Sunday, October 10, 2010

Quote:

Originally Posted by ufaq.memon

all members of the forum are requested to plz check my expansion/paragraph and point out weaknesses in order to improve my writing skills.

I think its a good effort. You may add one more practical example to justify your point. I have underlined/edited some words to suggest some corrections. You should also take due care of punctuation.

Eventually all Human Action must be judged by its moral contents
Human actions are the main identity of human conduct. The world is abound with many vices and due to the materialistic approach of the people, human actions are mostly in conformity with customs of the society. These customs are the approved standards of morality enacted for the self-interest, therefore, their violation brings animadversion of the whole society. Morality is considered as a code or principle deals(dealing) with right and wrong or good and bad behavior. Therefore, it is always argued that all human actions must be judged by its moral contents rather than customs prevalent in the society.
In a(the) world in general and Pakistan in particular(,) human actions are inclined towards customs prevalent in the society. Whenever, a renowned personality or a person affiliated with a political/religious organization is killed, the violence erupts which leads to the loss of several lives and property. It is due to the leaning of people towards customary morality rather than to act deliberately by keeping in view the moral values and responsibility.
Hazart Muhammad (PBUH) lived an exemplary life and the whole life was comprised of love and obedience, complete trust and thoughtfulness, peace and appreciation. In his whole life, whatever, he seemed wrong he openly denounced and forbade people,(.) h(H)owever, he always enjoined people to adopt altruistic approach. His behavior with the people raised him to the exalted position among people and not only friend but also foes praised for his conduct. Resultantly, due to his noble behavior, Islam flourished by leaps and bound as actions(action) speaks louder than words.
The world is replete with many vices and due to materialistic approach;(,) the societies have developed customary morality in order to safeguard their interest(s). Therefore, there is no denying fact that all human action must be judged by its moral contents.

ufaq.memon · #3 Sunday, October 10, 2010

Thanks for your honorable and valuable efforts. The mistakes point out by yourself has been noted for future. surely i would act on your precious advice.

ufaq Memon · #4 Monday, November 01, 2010

All the members of the forum are requested to check my expansion. The comments/remarks/suggestion in this regard will be highly appreciated

What we call progress is largely delusory

The progress means to move forward toward a better state. In this perspective it is said that the man has made remarkable progress in different sphere of life particularly after the industrial revolution.
In a field of science and technology, the man has made tremendous progress. The invention of modern electronic and communication technology has reduced the distances and the world has become a global village. The sea routes have been discovered to facilitate the transportation of goods among the countries. Man has landed on other planets to explore the means of living on these planets. Sky has been made traffic route for Air planes carrying passenger from one country to another country. The natural resources are being explored and utilized for the development of counties.
In the sphere of politics, the man has also made an extensive progress. The international organizations have been established to regulate the affairs of the world and to promote the peace in the world, because the invention of sophisticated weapons has brought the world at the brink of destruction. The twentieth century witnessed the change in the living standards of the most of the world due to the economic success of the countries. The world has become now interconnected and interdependent.
However, the progress made by the man seems one sided. There is no denying fact that man has made the significant progress in the fields of science and technology, economics, however, the progress has widened the gap among the people and the countries. On the basis of the above mentioned progress, the world is divided into two categories i.e. developed countries and underdeveloped countries. The people live in these have further been divided as rich and poor in general and in underdeveloped countries in particular. The poor people spend their whole life to earn the livelihood in order to survive. They engage in materialism so much that they neglect the voice of inner self. Therefore, they always remain devoid of mental peace and harmony. Whereas, the rich people live a life replete with luxuries and comfort often prone to vices prevalent in the society, which not only affect the worldly life but also create a disturbance in the mind which lead to mental disorder.
Therefore, it seems that the progress made by man is delusory. The advancement of science and technology has not only involved the human beings into materialism to large extent but also brought the world at brink of destruction due to the invention of sophisticated weapons.

kamran_shaikh · #5 Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Quote:

Originally Posted by ufaq Memon

All the members of the forum are requested to check my expansion. The comments/remarks/suggestion in this regard will be highly appreciated

What we call progress is largely delusory

The progress means to move forward toward a better state. In this perspective it is said that the man has made remarkable progress in different sphere(s) of life,particularly after the industrial revolution.
In a(THE) field of science and technology, the(Not necessary to put the here) man has made tremendous progress. The invention of modern electronic and communication technology has reduced the distances(distance) and the world has become a global village. The sea routes have been discovered to facilitate the transportation of goods among the countries. Man has landed on other planets to explore the means of living on these(those would be suitable) planets. Sky has been made traffic route for Air planes carrying passenger(s) from one country to another country(no necessary). (Put so,thus or hence as u have concluded the first paragraph)The natural resources are being explored and utilized for the development of counties.
Also,In the sphere of politics, the man has also(It would be better to put it in starting of this para as i have put n highlighted ) made an extensive progress. The international organizations have been established to regulate the affairs of the world and to promote the peace in the world(repetition of words.u could use after and "to promote peace on the earth), because (of)the invention of sophisticated weapons which has brought the world(planet) at the brink of destruction. The twentieth century witnessed the change in the living standards of the most of the world due to the economic success of the countries. The world has become now interconnected and interdependent.
However, the progress made by the man seems one sided. There is no denying fact that man has made the significant progress in the fields of science and technology, economics, however(but), the progress has widened the gap among the people and the countries. On the basis of the above mentioned progress, the world is(has been) divided into two categories i.e. developed countries and underdeveloped countries. The people live in these(in leiu of using "thses" "developed countries" should be used as it suits to the context) have further been divided as rich and as poor in general and in underdeveloped countries in particular. The poor people spend their whole life to earn the livelihood in order to survive. They engage in materialism so much that they neglect the voice of inner self. Therefore(?), they always remain devoid of mental peace and harmony. Whereas, the rich people live a life replete with luxuries and comfort often prone to vices prevalent in the society, which not only affect the worldly life but also create a disturbance in the mind which lead to mental disorder.
Therefore(You can also use here, conclusivley,to sum up,summing up, on the whole, finally, thus, hence, so, or another tansitional word suits=), it seems that the progress made by man is delusory. The advancement of science and technology has not only involved the human beings into materialism to large extent but also brought the world at brink of destruction due to the invention of sophisticated(this adjective can be replaced by highly developed; for u have used this three times.n repetition of words is discouraged as per rule of expansions) weapons.

Well, you have magnicent writing skills.
You have devided paragraphs smartly.
vocabulary--acceptable
Even though u have to work on expansions.it would have been more better, if u had used connectors.
Some grammatical mistakes.
Overall nice
Muhammad Kamran Shaikh

ufaq Memon · #6 Wednesday, November 03, 2010

thanks kamran for your input.
furthermore, any comments/suggestions from senior members and css qualifiers are requested.

ufaq Memon · #7 Monday, December 13, 2010

All members are requested to check my expansion. Comments/suggestions will be appreciated.

Speak no evil, hear no evil and see no evil

The evil spoil the character and personality of man. It distracts man’s mind from the path of righteousness and indulged in malicious deeds. Man is a mixture of good and evil, however, he has inclination more towards evil. The society is abound with evil and corrupt practices. Therefore, the maxim advises the man to shun evils of all from. The man can play a significant role to purge him and society as well from such evil and corrupt practices. The maxim provide noble recipe of moral uplift and purging of the man and society from the wrongdoings
The maxim implies that it should be done in the following steps. In the first step the man should begin first from himself and does not speak evil. He should refrain from all evils prevalent in the society and must adhere on the path of righteousness. Islam lays great emphasis on truthfulness and enjoins people to do right things and forbade the wrong things.
In the second step the maxim emphasized that man should not hear evil. In this situation he should raise the voice against malpractices and evils. If the man remains silent over such situation, then he becomes accomplice in the evildoing. In a third step man should not see evil. If he sees such type of injustice or wrongdoing against anyone, he should play an active role to help and try best to shun the evil at all cost. In this way man can purge him and society from evils and can live a happy life.

ufaq Memon · #8 Saturday, January 15, 2011

Members are again requested for the comments/suggestions on above Expansion.

irfan_ali · #9 Monday, February 14, 2011

Speak no evil, listen no evil and see no evil

Evil can be defined as anything proscribed by the religion or basic human laws. If taken its temporal aspect, an evil undermines eventually the peaceful coexistence of human beings for which different laws and regulations have been laid down to prevent it. It can be taken for granted that men indulging in evil things can be dangerous for peace of themselves as well as of others’. Henceforth, one needs to avoid all those misdeeds that come into the definition of evil. When enforcement of laws and regulations are weak, and role of education in a society poor, the control state over evil deeds is lost and the society gets victim of corruption, crime, extremism and many other socio-economic-cum-poltical evils. Perhaps, Pakistan is a lucid example of such issues. Gradually evil elements in the country are rising, even challenging the writ and will of the government at many instances. It would not be wrong to say that people have forgotten their basic role in the society and consequently things are getting worst. Apart from the role of state, it is the very role of individuals to avoid speaking, listening and seeing evil. If people successfully get rid of evil they surely make healthy contributions towards peace and prosperity of both their surroundings and society as a whole. This fact is well-known in many developed regions of world. They have truly enjoyed the boons of development, advancement and modernity. While many African and asian states are scenes of controversies, conflicts and instability. So, it is very well said that speak no evil…………

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