Improve English

[UltimateCSP]

I am starting this thread to improve English by removing grammatical mistakes. Post your writings here and Last Island, other moderators and seniors are requested to point out others when ever they make mistakes. This way this forum will become more useful and will be a great help for aspirants. Hope you all will cooperate...

[UltimateCSP]

Unconditional foreign aid in a correct rhythm is genuine blessing. The aid which assist in improving economic conditions, enforce developmental projects and comes with decrement of impoverishment handicapping is a boon. Wide dispersion of prosperity in recipient country is attest of foreign aid's importance.
A country, for example, is fertile in reservoirs but poor in resources to have vantage of these reservoirs. Foreign aid to such a country can be benediction in handling resources in order to boom. After World War II, for another example, USA to reconstruct shattered European nations.

Foreign aid faces handful challenges as well. If it is not delivered properly, it does good only to corrupt leaders and does never compass targeted purport. If a nation has to compromise over its sovereignty in order to get aid then it becomes more fetal rather than a help. It does not ameliorate economic conditions and scathe the image of a country at international level.
In third world countries like Pakistan and Lebanon, for example, aid is used for political purposes and to construct villas for already rich and is never benefited by one for whom it is sent. More over foreign aid makes a nation dependent. Israel, for example, is receiving aid from USA until 1948 to date and is through and through dependent on it.
In most of the cases it implants longitudinal unobliging effects over a country when not delivered with sound conditions or used with proper management.

(please correct me where i am wrong)

[aariz]

Originally Posted by Ultimate CSP

Unconditional foreign aid in a correct rhythm is genuine blessing. The aid which assist in improving economic conditions, enforce developmental projects and comes with decrement of impoverishment handicapping is a boon. Wide dispersion of prosperity in recipient country is attest of foreign aid's importance.
A country, for example, is fertile in reservoirs but poor in resources (ambiguity here) to have vantage of these reservoirs. Foreign aid to such a country can be benediction in handling resources in order to boom. (clause structure isnt correct)After World War II, for another example, USA to reconstruct shattered European nations.

Foreign aid faces handful challenges as well. If it is not delivered properly, it does good only to corrupt leaders and does never compass targeted purport. If a nation has to compromise over its sovereignty in order to get aid then it becomes more fetal rather than a help. It does not ameliorate economic conditions and scathe the image of a country at international level.
In third world countries like Pakistan and Lebanon, for example, aid is used for political purposes and to construct villas for already rich and is never benefited by one for whom it is sent. More over foreign aid makes a nation dependent. Israel, for example, is receiving aid from USA until 1948 to date and is through and through dependent on it.
In most of the cases(comma?) it implants longitudinal unobliging effects over a country when not delivered with sound conditions or used with proper management.

(please correct me where i am wrong)

Unconditional foreign aid in a correct rhythm is genuine blessing. The aid which assist in improving economic conditions, enforce developmental projects and comes with decrement of impoverishment handicapping is a boon. Wide dispersion of prosperity in recipient country is attest of foreign aid's importance.
A country, for example, is fertile in reservoirs but poor in resources (ambiguity here) to have vantage of these reservoirs. Foreign aid to such a country can be benediction in handling resources in order to boom. (clause structure isnt correct)After World War II, for another example, USA to reconstruct shattered European nations.

Foreign aid faces handful challenges as well. If it is not delivered properly, it does good only to corrupt leaders and does never compass targeted purport. If a nation has to compromise over its sovereignty in order to get aid then it becomes more fetal rather than a help. It does not ameliorate economic conditions and scathe the image of a country at international level.
In third world countries like Pakistan and Lebanon, for example, aid is used for political purposes and to construct villas for already rich and is never benefited by one for whom it is sent. More over foreign aid makes a nation dependent. Israel, for example, is receiving aid from USA until 1948 to date and is through and through dependent on it.
In most of the cases(comma?) it implants longitudinal unobliging effects over a country when not delivered with sound conditions or used with proper management.

[aariz]

Dont use bombastic vocab If you are practicing for essay or current affairs.

[UltimateCSP]

thanks for correction.

Originally Posted by aariz

Dont use bombastic vocab If you are practicing for essay or current affairs.

I am trying to practice for essay or expansion. My teacher for English suggested to replace every commonly used word of English with some professional one. Actually i was trying for it. Is not it a food approach??

[UltimateCSP]

To define extremism is quite tricky. In oecumenical way it can be defined as hard and fast obligation of self made values and rules. There is an interesting aspect that no one anticipates itself as extremist. This term is always used for out group by members of a specific group.

If we dive deep in the conceptual world we may come with that extremism can be in any sphere of life. A buff, for example, who self annihilates itself due to failure in getting love is an extremist. A student, for an other example, who says good bye to its studies as it stayed fail to achieve a certain target in exams. A politician mostly in case of a dictator who implies its policies with out agreement of senate, also falls in the category of extremism. There are as many varieties of extremists as many spheres of life.

Religion is no exception of it. Bajrang Dal, for instance, are Hindu who profess utter most practice of their faith. The movie "Slumdog Millionaire" well explains this approach in Hinduism. Christians who follow traditional old testament are labeled with this tag. Islam has exception of all as praxis of other religion's fundamental virtues is extremism while in case of Islam it is moderators.

Review of psychology of extremist demonstrates that it has its own world. It interacts with outer world for two reasons. First being its primary needs i.e. food etc. and second being the wish to manipulate the outer world.

With a bit philosophical and scientific approach it can be articulated that extremism is a virus and man kind is carrier of it. This virus requires feasible environmental conditions at young age to flourish. If it gets proper conditions, it grows and makes a young one an extremist.

If we have a look at symptoms and conditions of extremist, we may infer that it is suffering either from Alexithynia or Autism Spectrum Disorder. In some severe situations it may suffer lack of empathy and even Psychopathy.

Stop labeling buffs, failures, dictators and suicide bombers as crazy and cruel. Instead they deserve our sympathy. They need Psychopathology.


Correction please....

[aariz]

Originally Posted by Ultimate CSP

thanks for correction.



I am trying to practice for essay or expansion. My teacher for English suggested to replace every commonly used word of English with some professional one. Actually i was trying for it. Is not it a food approach??

For good writing, repetition of words is considered boring. Use synonyms, phrases and terms to express the same idea.

Originally Posted by Ultimate CSP

To define extremism is quite tricky. In oecumenical way it can be defined as hard and fast obligation of self made values and rules. There is an interesting aspect that no one anticipates itself as extremist. This term is always used for out group by members of a specific group.

If we dive deep in the conceptual world we may come with that extremism can be in any sphere of life. A buff, for example, who self annihilates itself due to failure in getting love is an extremist. A student, for an other example, who says good bye to its studies as it stayed fail to achieve a certain target in exams. A politician mostly in case of a dictator who implies its policies with out agreement of senate, also falls in the category of extremism. There are as many varieties of extremists as many spheres of life.

Religion is no exception of it. Bajrang Dal, for instance, are Hindu who profess utter most practice of their faith. The movie "Slumdog Millionaire" well explains this approach in Hinduism. Christians who follow traditional old testament are labeled with this tag. Islam has exception of all as praxis of other religion's fundamental virtues is extremism while in case of Islam it is moderators.

Review of psychology of extremist demonstrates that it has its own world. It interacts with outer world for two reasons. First being its primary needs i.e. food etc. and second being the wish to manipulate the outer world.

With a bit philosophical and scientific approach it can be articulated that extremism is a virus and man kind is carrier of it. This virus requires feasible environmental conditions at young age to flourish. If it gets proper conditions, it grows and makes a young one an extremist.

If we have a look at symptoms and conditions of extremist, we may infer that it is suffering either from Alexithynia or Autism Spectrum Disorder. In some severe situations it may suffer lack of empathy and even Psychopathy.

Stop labeling buffs, failures, dictators and suicide bombers as crazy and cruel. Instead they deserve our sympathy. They need Psychopathology.


Correction please....

corrections
1. spelling mistake in ecumenical
2. article error: as a hard
3. punctuation mistake
4. FAN n Enthusiast is better than BUFF. Dont use difficult vacab MIA
5. Baki galtia, baad mey nikalta hoo, dosto nay bulaya hai.

[Ahmed_2007_Cool]

Originally Posted by Ultimate CSP

Unconditional foreign aid in a correct rhythm is genuine blessing. The aid which assist in improving economic conditions, enforce developmental projects and comes with decrement of impoverishment handicapping is a boon. Wide dispersion of prosperity in recipient country is attest of foreign aid's importance.
A country, for example, is fertile in reservoirs but poor in resources to have vantage of these reservoirs. Foreign aid to such a country can be benediction in handling resources in order to boom. After World War II, for another example, USA to reconstruct shattered European nations.

Unconditional foreign aid in just the right amounts can be a genuine blessing. The aid which assists in improving economic conditions, jump-starting developmental projects and which comes with the the potency to decrease poverty and reliance on outside powers is indeed a blessing. A wide dispersion of prosperity in certain recipient states (Germany, Korea, Japan, etc) is a testament to foreign aid's importance.
If a country, for example, is abundant in reservoirs of natural resources but is lacking in the resources required to extract them, foreign aid can be hugely beneficial in the extraction of those resources in order to achieve economic prosperity. After the Second World War, for example, the USA aided in the reconstruction of the war-shattered European states.




I've just finished correcting your first two paragraphs and there were plenty of mistakes in them. As said above, avoid using unnaturally flowery language. Your aim should be to effectively convey your message, trying to impress the examiner with 'big words' will not work, it'll only end up making your essay look cheesy/corny.

[aariz]

Originally Posted by aariz

corrections
1. spelling mistake in ecumenical
2. article error: as a hard
3. punctuation mistake
4. FAN n Enthusiast is better than BUFF. Dont use difficult vacab MIA
5. Baki galtia, baad mey nikalta hoo, dosto nay bulaya hai.

Originally Posted by Ultimate CSP

To define extremism is quite tricky. In oecumenical way it can be defined as hard and fast obligation of self made values and rules. There is an interesting aspect that no one anticipates itself as extremist. This term is always used for out group by members of a specific group.

If we dive deep in the conceptual world we may come with that extremism can be in any sphere of life. A buff, for example, who self annihilates itself due to failure in getting love is an extremist. A student, for an other example, who says good bye to its studies as it stayed fail to achieve a certain target in exams. A politician mostly in case of a dictator who implies its policies with out agreement of senate, also falls in the category of extremism. There are as many varieties of extremists as many spheres of life.

Religion is no exception of it. Bajrang Dal, for instance, are Hindu who profess utter most practice of their faith. The movie "Slumdog Millionaire" well explains this approach in Hinduism. Christians who follow traditional old testament are labeled with this tag. Islam has exception of all as praxis of other religion's fundamental virtues is extremism while in case of Islam it is moderators.

Review of psychology of extremist demonstrates that it has its own world. It interacts with outer world for two reasons. First being its primary needs i.e. food etc. and second being the wish to manipulate the outer world.

With a bit philosophical and scientific approach it can be articulated that extremism is a virus and man kind is carrier of it. This virus requires feasible environmental conditions at young age to flourish. If it gets proper conditions, it grows and makes a young one an extremist.

If we have a look at symptoms and conditions of extremist, we may infer that it is suffering either from Alexithynia or Autism Spectrum Disorder. In some severe situations it may suffer lack of empathy and even Psychopathy.

Stop labeling buffs, failures, dictators and suicide bombers as crazy and cruel. Instead they deserve our sympathy. They need Psychopathology.


Correction please....

5. He/she
6. incorrect use of AS
7. Why praxis. Use practice or performance and another easier word
8. Moderate is the correct use
9 first k baad comma.
10. punctuation error
11. mankind MILA kar likho.
12. a young one an extremist. beta.. idhar article mistake hai.
13. of extremist: an article must be used here
14. situations it punctuation missing
15. it is wrong use of pronoun
16. Instead : Write INDEED or ACTUALLY

[candidguy]

@Ultimate CSP

I'm not a in a position to advise you,for I myself make so many mistakes while writing.But if I were asked to advise you,then I would say,"Go to Exploring the world of English and master The Punctuation".Start writing once you've mastered it.Secondly,while writing try not to use pretentious words,and also try to avoid platitude.(those days are gone when people got impressed by high-sounding words,today they provoke ridicule rather than admiration~saadat shah)

This is the advice,I've chosen for myself and for you.

regards.