Originally Posted by newstudent

Your precis:

"It is a matter of vital importance that modern sciences have not realized any significance of culture despite huge developments in science. The psychologist have ignored the potential of man and developed a materialistic world where emotionless deliberation has transformed man into an monetary instrument. The systems of communism and capitalism were also the yields of the same think-tank that it discouraged the growth of cultural, social and emotional feelings. successive wars and insensitive technology have threatened the objective of life in this planet. The adverse environment, full of terror, has made the role of scientist controversial subject to predictable dangerous life, in the light of destructive inventions. How the life emerged? The question needs amplification due to indistinct contribution of scientists, politicians and religion. Its erroneous to say man a ‘specie’."

Some Suggestions (May sound harsh but I am writing it in good faith so be patient) :

1. You say "It is a matter of vital importance ....". You are making it matter of vital importance passage doesnt say that. So stick to what is said in precis.
2. You say "The psychologist have ignored the potential of man and developed a materialistic world where emotionless deliberation has transformed man into an monetary instrument." Psychologist focused on psyche and ignored the physical aspect, they didnt made man into a monetary instrument. Try to understand what passage says. Passage means that due to non synthesis of Darwin's theory and psychologist thinking the result is emergence of man as an economic being.
3. You say "The systems of communism and capitalism were also the yields of the same think-tank.....". Which think-tank you are referring to. You didnt describe it earlier.
4. You say "Its erroneous to say man a ‘specie’." Well this is not mentioned in original passage.

Again I am saying that I am giving my honest opinion, if you find it not useful then ignore it.

Regards

Originally Posted by rishzzz

Describing

It is easy to find out mistakes while v read and difficult to catch them while v r writing, so dont mind....

Originally Posted by rishzzz

ENGLISH (Précis)

1. Make a Précis of the following passage about one third of its length and suggest a suitable title. (25)[/I]

Along with the new revelations of science and psychology there have also occurred distortions of what is being discovered. -Most of the scientists and psychologists have accepted Darwin’s theory of evolution and his observations on “survival of the fittest” as a final word. While enunciating his-postulate on the concept of the fittest, Darwin primarily projected physical force as the main criterion, and remained unmindful of the culture of mind, The psychologist, on the other hand, in his exclusive involvement with the psyche, has overlooked the potential of man’s physical-self and the world outside him. No synthesis has been attempted between the two with the obvious result of the one being sacrificed at the altar of the other. This has given birth to a civilisation which is wholly based on economic considerations, transforming man into a mere “economic being” and limiting, his pleasures and sorrows to sensuous cravings. With the force of his craft and guns, this man of the modern world gave birth to two cannibalistic philosophies, the cunning capitalism and the callous communism. They joined hands to block the evolution of man as a cultural entity, denuding him of the feelings of love, sympathy, and humanness. Technologically, man is immensely powerful; culturally, he is the creature ‘of stoneage, as lustful as ever, and equally ignorant of his destiny. The two world wars and the resultant attitudes display harrowing distortion of the purposes of life and power. In this agonizing situation the Scientist is harnessing forces of nature, placing them at the feet of his country’s leaders, to be used against people in other parts of the world. This state of his servility makes the functions of the scientist appear merely to push humanity to a state of perpetual fear, and lead man to the inevitable destruction as a species with his own inventions and achievements. This irrational situation raises many questions. They concern the role of a scientist, the function of religion, the conduct of politician who is directing the course 5f history, and the future role of man as a species. There is an obvious mutilation of the purpose of creation, and the relationship .between Cosmos, Life, and Man is hidden from eyes; they have not been viewed collectively..

Originally Posted by rishzzz

Comment: Very Good, you have improved a lot, n ur expression woth appreciation, i personally liked ur precis

Originally Posted by Sabah Hunzai

thanks rishzzz for your encourgement, I am fearful about this paper along with mighty ESSAY... anyhow keep going inshallah we will win one day.

thanks for identifying mistakes..

I don't know why seniors have turned their heads away from us. they are not commenting.