English Essay is a paper in which the choice of the essay really matters a lot. English Essay along with English Precis & Composition is one of those papers where the aim of the FPSC is to eliminate a large number of candidates. These are essentially filter exams. In my opinion, it was essentially a bad choice to do this essay as it is such a controversial topic. In consecutive years similar essays or essays involving similar issues have been thrown up by the paper-setter just to invite a majority of students to attempt them. Even if the content is right, expression is good, your ideas may or may not find approval of the examiner. From the outline presented by you, your essay is lopsided and typical in condemning the West for all the ills faced by the Muslim world and addressing the "responsibilities of Muslim Ummah" (as was expressly required by the examiner) only at point no. 12 and 13. Additionally, it was really a bad and self-contradictory choice to end your essay with a quote from Gen. Musharraf, a much-hated and controversial figure nowadays in Pakistan (perhaps even the examiner might consider you a great chamcha of Musharraf). Remember, Mush is himself considered a puppet of the West and your attempt to first malign the West and then use of a quotation from a puppet of the West may not be much appreciated by the examiner. Sorry mate for being so harsh on your essay, but better luck next time.

@DuaA
@Private
@555
@Engle
and ALL the candidates,
Every body has a unique and different approach and perception towards things.The angles of viewing a matter vary from person to person.It does not mean that one is right and the other is wrong.Both are right at their stands.So,the approaches, interpretations,stuff and methods of dealing a subject are different for obvious reason.How i dealt with the topic"Image of Islam in the west and responsibilties of Muslim Ummah" may differ from the other candidate/s. i donot take it amiss if u are hard in analysis of my essay. I respect ur comments with the core of my heart.But it should be logical and just so that my purpose of pasting the essay here may rightly be served.

regards,

irfi

@ sandhurst.

well..healthy practice it is to invite the "critical analysis" and wht should follow it must be with some sort of soberness and logic .For, though every person has right in its own sphere to comment wht ever comes in to his mind but to throw up stray comments get no where for the appreciation as they are void of calculated stuff.
firstly ,your comment that "the content is right, expression is good, your ideas may or may not find approval of the examiner".This shows the influence of pessimism on ones head .For, the Fpsc provides you opportunity to pass the exam not to fail in it.And examiner wht i suppose does not keep his biased attitude while checking paper ,for hunderds pass the essay paper ... and can one think that examiners (one person ) has equally the same view as the two hundereds have about the topic?
Secondly, the essay is self-expression of an individual towards topic.it is never meant to reflect wht goes in the mind of examiner. Further,ingredients of essay or wht is required to pass an essay is tht you have to put ur articulation of thoughts cogently ,well connected ,argumentatively substantive, logically acceptable and more importantly focused to the theme or thesis statement of the essay . If intrepretation of an essay is right and one succeeds to keep the strings(paragraphs of an essay )attached/held straight to the central point , one stands at good chance to pass it.


Thirdly, in your opinion ... Mushraf is pro-west and is much hated figure in Pakistan... .....but may be not of an examiner.....but this may also be understood that there are political contrivances and political interests that determine what future course of policy be determined.It depends not at the whim of some one to lead the country with certain policy .


and lastly, dear sandhurst ... it is never appreciative to address some one with "chamcha of mushraf" and in the end saying one : better luck next timeas you did). For, no one is authority but examiner, who knows wht happens at the end of day... hope u understand.

Good luck for all candidates of 2007.My prayers are with you.

You started your essay with the clash of capi and commu :.These are two economic systems, linking them with a religion can create a negative impact on the examiner ,if the essay was on islamic economic system then linking these systems with islamic system would have been appropriate.Anyways rest of the material seems good.
Good Luck

Regards

W.H.J

__________________
The only thing we have to fear is fear Itself !! :O

the topic is " image of islam in west n responsibilites of ummah"...this essay should be attempted in two parts as it has gotten two clearly parts that is:

1: image of islam in west
2: responsibilites of ummah

in my opinion, first part requires knowledge n second part requires creativity.

in css, one must show some sort of uniqueness in ones ideas...so it is really a tricky essay...as every body would have written tht.... image of islam is not not in west in part 1 n oic in part 2...so same stuff from every candidate...

as far as 4000-5000 words r concerned... even 50000 words can be written on this topic but time didnt permit...

u wrote mostly on part 1 as done by many candidates n did a little justice with part 2 which i think was the core part bcuz when v talk abt responsibilites of ummah we know nothing but OIC...so examiner will give credit for something new...

pray 4 ur success...

analyse mine one also:

also wrote the same essay...my outline was...

A: IMAGE OF ISLAM IN WEST


1: History of islam from Hazrat adam to date.
2: Meaning of word islam.
3: image of islam in the days of prophets.
4: islam after prophet Mohammad ( SAW).
5: clash of civilizations
6: distortion of islam by muslims
7: wrong concept of islam in west
8: allegations of west against islam
a: half witness of woman
b: no right of inheritance ( half to woman )
c: man n woman...not equal
d: seclusion
e :job not allowed to woman
f: no right of education ( statistics of majority of muslim nations )
g:women cant drive ( case of saudi arb )
h : man is a step ahead than woman ( reference from quran )
i: woman cant be head of state
j : couple of more.....
9: clarification by muslims ( reference from quran for each of the above allegations )
10: Why islam has distorted image in west ????
11: Answer lies in the propaganda of western specially american n israeli MEDIA
12: Agenda setting by western media( couple of examples)
13: reasons for disinforming western people by media
a: muslim wealth ( oil )
b: wants to prove muslims as terrorist in order to get support of people
14:current image of islam in west

B : RESPONSIBILTIES OF UMMAH

1: wrong diagnosis of disease
a: its not war against islam but muslim wealth
2: wrong diagnosis...so wrong prescription i.e extremism
3: extremism is proving counter productive for west.
4: need of the hour
a: unity ( oic)
5: proposed changes in the structure of oic
a: all nations should give part of their sovereignity to oic
b: west should deal with oic for oil instead of indiviual nations.
c: there must be common currency for oic as euro
d: islamic channel for countering western media
6: Strategy of ENLIGHTEN MODERATION
a: shun extremisiom
b: achieve 100 percent education
7: conclusion

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Haji