Thanks.
One may choose that course, but I have a better command on global scenarios. That's why I discussed them in the first place.

One thing that bothers me about this outline is that it revolves around so many examples and little argumentation.


Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk

Cogito is steering your ship towards right direction do pay heed to his words.Argumentation is key to the scoring Essay and you can build arguments on examples. Start with Prophet Muhammad, move on with Nelson, Jinah..... Etc.

At state level quote China, Japan etc and how can Pakistan learn from them.

Go global, eradicate poverty and terrorism while mitigating climate effect. This will easily translate into a 50+ essay.

Thank you so much for the appreciation and the guidance. May Allah bless you with exceptional success and achievement.

I've noted the points you raised, and I'll try not to complicate things from now on.

However, as far as the rise of Japan is concerned, I think that doesn't fit into this topic. Although, she face alot of devastation and somehow managed to reemerge as a well developed nation, but did she used any of lemons in the recipe of her success? I think not!

And I know too little about Nelson Mandela and others to be able to quote their examples. All of the content I wrote is solely from my previously held knowledge. Since I plan to write on such kind of essay in the exam, I will try to learn about these personalities.

As you suggested me to write introduction as well, here is another essay with outline, thesis statement and the introduction.







I'm confused about the thesis statement. Considering the way I write outline, how should I write the thesis statement? Would you please take the pain of writing thesis for these two essays!

Another important thing, did you take any coaching class for English? Would you recommend me to find a permanent mentor?

Many thanks, seriously!

Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk

__________________
One must be a wise reader to quote wisely and well; said Bronson Alcott

Safeer Khan I just read few lines of your essay 'Beggars cannot be choosers'. Your writing style has impressed me. You really know how to deal with essay topic. Are you really a beginner as you mentioned in your previous post? Is 'When life gives you lemons, make lemonade' your first essay?


Nothing is perfect and there is always room for improvement Cogito will guide you. This will also be an opportunity for me to learn from Cogito.

__________________
Khushboo Hai Mere Khoon Mein Kafoor Ki Manind,
Bikhrunga Fizaun Mein Ek Noor Ki Manind . . .

Thank you so much.

I made my mind to appear in CSS in July. I didn't know even about Karl Marx at that time. Never read newspaper in my entire life.

I tried to make outlines for two or three other topics previously but never finished any of those. Recently, I realized that now is the time to start practising essay as I have accumulated enough knowledge to quote examples.

I have also studied about the basic structure of an essay though never practiced it.

Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk

__________________
One must be a wise reader to quote wisely and well; said Bronson Alcott

Ok good enough.. Here is something i would like to add in..

Agile business technique which tells us how to turn unexpected threats into opportunities... Like energy crisis and how UPS, Generator, Battery, Cellphone industries turn the crisis into their favor. See how Pakistan is the land of opportunities though similary business students would know (KANBAN, 6-sigma, Leagile etc)

Moreover when your resources are shrinking how would you reduce the waste (TIMWOOD) to turn into your favor again. This is just one aspect of the topic (economic)

Countless examples seniors would give you but make sure that never let go off OBJECTIVITY and choose a topic which is not that open where you have to jump off to totally another story in next paragraph. There should be connectivity and coherence.

I like the idea of how you have surgically analyzed the topic for your understanding. You can organize the outline yes you posses the academic writing skills. quality of your content would improve exponentially when you will go through the css preparation.

Always remember "OBJECTIVITY!- to the point"

Goodluck!

Also how quaid-e-azam turned the racist attitude of hindus (pre-partition) to gather Muslims under one banner. (Maybe that was inevitable). But you see CSS is how you successfully make irrelevant things relevant.

my dear brother safeer, your work, way of contextualizing the ideas and amalgamating the global,national-individual perspectives are worth appreciating. i agree with cognito's suggestion instead of giving Ambani as entrepreneur; you should include life of Prophet Muhammad's life and Nelson or M.K luther. one more suggestion; i could be wrong but i felt little attractiveness in words of outline. make phrases of outlines more catchy and attention-getter. so reader or examiner can feel the enthusiastic compulsion to find out more in your essay.

you had not mentioned, how famous people grasped their opportunities in their hard time, like helek keller, josef stalin, they truly mad lemonade from lemon. don't you see the social order where this proverb is truly applicable?

__________________
move fast and break things

First of all, is your comment directed towards me? If yes,
You have rightly pointed out towards another aspect that can be tapped and didn't strike my mind previously.
Thank you!
By the way, who is Helen Keller? So many people seem to like him or her.

Please also see the other essay, I've posted in this thread.

Brother, I am neither a business graduate nor have opted any business subject as an optional. My understanding in the field of economics is quite limited comprised of free trade, indirect direct taxation and that's it.
That's why I could make a little understanding of the examples you have qouted.
Would you please rephrase and elaborate some of your points?

Finally, you have rightly pointed out the issue with this approach of mine. It involves following two steps: finding so many relevant examples at so many different levels and writing them properly. Both need technical treatment. Since I am yet to write a complete essay starting from the introduction to the conclusion, how would I be able to carry out the writing task is still a challenge for me. But I want to make sure that the paper checker would have already made his my mind to pass me before he goes on to read the text of the essay.

Firstly, Thank you for kind words.
Secondly, taking into account Mr. Ambani's example can be a key to standout of the crowd and leave an impression of open-mindedness. But yes, qouting example Muhammad's (PBUH) life would give it a final touch.
Thirdly, I am aware of the fact that my writing lacks catchy phrases.
A part of the unattractiveness is due to the alternating use of phrases and sentences.
Please tell whether there is any concrete rule that outline must be written in phrases or sentences? If both are allowed, should one outline be based on only phrases or sentences, or both can be used in one outline? Plus, do you have any suggestion how to overcome this deficiency of less attractive phrasing?

Please also comment on the second essay "beggars cannot be choosers". Tell me how are my outline and the thesis statement. I'm especially in doubt about the latter.

Sent from my SM-N900 using Tapatalk

__________________
One must be a wise reader to quote wisely and well; said Bronson Alcott

Thats fine i am not even a business student but the point i want to raise here is staying precisely to the point, now the problem with such essays is that one can only quote examples and examples to built an argument on it which in my opinion does not built a strong case (very few people can do that). not all forms of writings can come under these topics whereas when you take on an essay like war on terror (with a clear rhetoric) you have so much to write yet you have to be very selective, you use all forms of writing expressions it comes to you naturally, but one has to make a trade-off by going towards a balanced essay. Once you do it you have 10 to 11 subjects that you have prepared already and you can have 10 to 11 different sets of ideas to bring on the table, there is always always something you can relate to.. hope it helps